"I'm going around the world," my mother told me breathlessly. "On Friday."
It was a year after my father had died, six months before their 50th anniversary. She was 76 and about to bravely board a 100-day cruise trip. The only boat she'd previously boarded was the Staten Island Ferry. I was worried: who would look after her?
"She was sailing away to Honolulu, then onto Australia, Hong Kong, Israel, Egypt, Mediterranean ports — and then a leisurely glide back across the Atlantic.""I need to get away," she announced — from her grief. "It's very convenient since it docks back in Fort Lauderdale. Close to my apartment."
"When the ship finally docked, I went to the window and exclaimed, 'Land!' Anyone seeing me would think I'd flipped my lid."
She was sailing away to Honolulu, then onto Australia, Hong Kong, Israel, Egypt, Mediterranean ports — and then a leisurely glide back across the Atlantic.
Following Her Itinerary
It felt unsettling to be so far apart without our frequent phone calls, reassuring her that I was there for her even though Dad wasn't. It was 1987, long before e-mail. The only way I could check her progress and remain in touch across the Pacific Ocean was following the itinerary map she'd sent me.
And then, her postcards began to arrive in my mailbox.
Since we left Frisco, we saw nothing but black clouds. This morning I saw a magnificent sunrise and beautiful pink clouds, she wrote. When I undress, I never pull the curtains because the only thing I see is water, water, water. Such a big ocean …. When the ship finally docked, I went to the window and exclaimed, 'Land!' Anyone seeing me would think I'd flipped my lid.
It was as if I were on the trip with her — even though by the time I received her postcard from Honolulu, she was on her way to Brisbane. Each postcard brought me onboard with her, and I cherished her joy of exploration.
I walked four laps around the ship — I've learned not to call it a boat, she wrote. Four laps equals one mile, which I hope compensates for the five desserts I ate.
Reveling In Her Discoveries 
I was thrilled and bittersweet to read about her sense of discovery. It must have been similar to the way she'd felt after sending me to college, 600 miles away, knowing I'd never return the same.
"I've arranged to take an overland trip in China. I don't know how you're gonna keep me down on the farm."
We're in the South Pacific, because it's the first day we saw sun and 75 degrees, she wrote next. The boat rocks like crazy. We walk like drunks. I've arranged to take an overland trip in China. I don't know how you're gonna keep me down on the farm.
Her next postcard was from New Zealand: Waves fifteen feet high, ocean 24,000 feet deep, she declared.
Eight days passed: no word. Two cards from Sydney made me sigh with relief, even though she was moving farther away.
I felt uneasy, the way I was when my daughter first began walking to school in sixth grade. Initially, I followed her ten-block route from the opposite sidewalk. Although I couldn't closely watch over Mom as she traversed the world, I had a permanent record of her adventures.
Postcards as Memories 
Like most of us, I don't write many letters anymore, but I'll never give up postcards. When I travel, I love to go into foreign post offices, testing out my limited language and feeling connected to people in faraway places. Even the stamps I buy are a lesson in art and history, bringing me back to enjoying my father's stamp collection with him. Sometimes my postcards arrive home after I do, but it's always a joy to see a text from my grown daughter, saying, I just got your postcard!
"UNBELIEVABLE! Cried when I saw the Taj."
Texting is immediate and impermanent. Instagram Stories evaporate in 24 hours. But postcards are irreplaceable memories and enduring records of our lives. They date back nearly 200 years. Collecting vintage postcards is known as deltiology — the third largest hobby after stamps and coins. Personal postcards enable us to keep in touch and know that we're thinking about each other in just six economical sentences — longer than a Tweet and shorter than the commitment of a letter.
During Mom's round the world trip, I wrote back to her at every port with news of her seven grandchildren and the stock market ups and downs. She'd respond:
In China, all we kept hearing about were the Ming, Tang, Han Dynasties, some from 200 A.D., B.C., etc. Finally learned to eat with chopsticks!
In India, she was nearly arrested. She and her mates had picked up viruses and Mom was chugging cough syrup. Before leaving the ship for a land trip to the Taj Mahal, she asked a waiter for lemons and a knife so she could sip hot potions to soothe her chest.
At the airport, an official noticed the knife. Authorities searched her and her baggage again.
I thought I'd end up in jail, she wrote. Finally, I said, 'Take the G-d D- knife. I don't want it.'
And then: UNBELIEVABLE! Cried when I saw the Taj.
The more she voyaged, the more she proved she could take care of herself on her own.
Picture a sheet of ice without a ripple — that's what the Indian Ocean looks like today. I've been on a camel ride, an elephant ride, petted the sacred cows. Wish you could have been here with me.
Sailing through Italy, she started speaking Italian. Magnifico!" was the way she described Michelangelo's David and each gelato she ate. A rivo derche, she signed off.
Magnifico! was the way she described Michelangelo's David and each gelato she ate. 
A Daughter's Love for Travel 
When she became a landlubber again and we finally hugged in person, she recited Robert Louis Stevenson's last words: "Home is the sailor, home from the sea/And the hunter home from the hill." She'd never been to college because she had to work to support her family right out of high school, but her postcards demonstrated how much she'd learned in three months.
When my daughter was in ninth grade, I started encouraging her to send home postcards when she embarked on a school language trip to Paris. In college, she returned to the City of Light to study abroad. We'd never been apart for five months, which felt endless. But I was able to share her new faraway life with her messages on the back of photos of cobblestoned streets and flaky croissants. She expanded her mail to both grandmothers, such a small effort to make them feel happy and noticed. They hung her postcards on their refrigerators.
My daughter fell in love with travel at a much younger age than my mother. On every trip throughout her twenties, she sent me multiple postcards. My young girl, who used to complain about traipsing through museums, was now describing Impressionist paintings like an art historian.
Today, my mother's round-the-world postcards are ensconced in a box in my closet. Whenever I take them out, I read her old-fashioned script and remember how she blossomed from a mourning widow into a sophisticated, independent traveler. She's no longer here with me, but her postcard memoir is forever.


How My Mother's Postcards Forged Connections Across Generations

Candy Schulman

Inflation is slowing down, hopefully for good. But real interest rates — what you can earn from investing in safe government bonds over and above inflation remain high. Since 2022 real yields on Treasury Inflation Protected Securities (TIPS), also known as inflation-indexed bonds, have gone from below zero to roughly 2%. Where savers were once willing to lend their money to the U.S. government in exchange for limiting their loss, they are now being compensated quite handsomely.
The goal is to have the TIPS provide inflation-adjusted income — a combination of interest and principal payments — in each year to meet some or all of your spending needs.Figure 1. Real interest rates have risen dramatically over the past few years
Source: Board of Governors of the Federal Reserve System
For those preparing for or already in retirement, this is especially good news. Buying individual TIPS that mature across different years — a strategy known as building a TIPS ladder – can help you lock in a stream of inflation-adjusted income for as long as 30 years.
Let's put this into perspective. When real rates were 0% back in early 2022, it cost about $1 million to build a TIPS ladder producing $100,000 of inflation-adjusted income each year for the next 10 years. Now, with real rates near 2%, the same decade of $100,000 of annual inflation-adjusted income costs about $900,000.
Think about that for a minute. The same stream of dollars, precisely the same purchasing power, now costs $100,000 less, letting you spend $10,000 more per year.
Your Financial Plan
What does this mean for your financial plan? Now's a good time to build your TIPS ladder. Doing so can help you lock in a higher living standard without taking unnecessary risk.
Let's be more concrete. Consider the Johnsons, a 70-year-old retired couple with $40,000 a year in Social Security income and $2 million in savings, including $1 million in retirement accounts and $1 million in taxable investments. Back in early 2022, when real rates were 0%, if they had created a financial plan using a planning tool such as MaxiFi Planner, an application sold by a company I run when I'm not teaching, they could have built a TIPS ladder to support their spending over the next 30 years. They could safely afford to spend about $49,671 on discretionary spending, adjusted for inflation, each year through age 100. Discretionary spending is spending on top of fixed expenses, like housing, taxes and Medicare premiums.
Now, with real rates at about 2%, the Johnsons, with the exact same financial goals and resources, can safely afford to spend $69,579. In effect, the higher real return on TIPS has safely increased their discretionary spending in retirement by $19,908 every year for life. That is a 40% increase in their standard of living.
Figure 2. Higher real rates have increased how much the Johnsons can safely afford to spend on their living standard
How to Build a TIPS Ladder
In practice, building a TIPS ladder means buying inflation-indexed Treasury bonds of different maturities, either from your regular assets or a brokerage account in your IRA. The goal is to have the TIPS provide inflation-adjusted income — a combination of interest and principal payments — in each year to meet some or all of your spending needs.
Figuring out how much real annual income you need the ladder to produce, and for how long, is probably the most important question to address first. Start by considering how to build a TIPS ladder that produces at least enough income in addition to Social Security (and any other guaranteed income you may have, like a pension or annuity) to cover all your fixed costs in retirement.
Building a ladder is relatively straightforward. Use an online application like Tips Ladder to determine the best bonds for your situation, and then buy those bonds through your discount broker. It can be done in an afternoon — although getting a real human on the phone is usually best.
Let's consider the hypothetical Johnson family again. Between paying their taxes and covering housing and Medicare-related costs in retirement, their annual fixed spending is projected to be about $60,000, adjusted for inflation, for the next 30 years.
Figure 3. The Johnsons expect to spend about $60,000 per year on fixed expenses in retirement
With $40,000 of inflation-adjusted annual Social Security income, this means the Johnsons will require an additional $20,000 of inflation-adjusted annual income for the next 30 years to cover all of their fixed spending ($60,000 – $40,000 = $20,000). At today's real rate of 2%, this will cost them about $450,000. (Note that when TIPS rates were 0%, the equivalent ladder cost $600,000.) If they wanted to cover some portion of their discretionary spending as well — the turquoise bars in figure 3 — they could invest even more into their TIPS ladder.
Upside Investing Basics
Let's say you want to use TIPS to safely cover all of your fixed spending plus some minimum acceptable level of discretionary spending in retirement — what we'll call your living-standard floor. Having locked in this living-standard floor you can now engage in so-called upside investing, by investing your remaining savings in risky assets like stocks.
If the stocks underperform (or go to zero) you can still safely maintain your living-standard floor. And, if they perform as (or better than) expected you can safely increase your living-standard floor each year by converting a portion of the stocks to TIPS over time. Let's consider the Johnsons again.
The Johnsons desire a discretionary spending floor of about $40,000 per year, adjusted for inflation. To accomplish this, in addition to covering all their fixed spending in retirement not already covered by Social Security, they invest about $1.35 million of their savings into a TIPS ladder that produces about $60,000 of annual real income for 30 years ($40,000 to pay for their living-standard floor and $20,000 to cover their residual fixed spending).
Then, they take their remaining $650,000 of savings and invest it in stocks, like a low-cost S&P 500 index fund. Each year they sell a portion of the stock — gradually, so they do not risk exhausting this cushion before they die.
Invest that capital gain in TIPS and you can consistently raise your living-standard floor throughout retirement. If stocks perform poorly (see dark blue line in Figure 4), the Johnsons' living standard floor may not rise much. But, if stocks perform as expected (see light blue line), the Johnsons will be able to spend well above their floor by capturing the upside.
Figure 4. The Johnsons use TIPS to lock in a $40,000 living standard floor, and then invest the rest in stocks, hoping to increase discretionary spending in the future.
In a sense, upside investing is like having your cake and eating it too. By using TIPS to cover your fixed spending and lock-in a desired living-standard floor in retirement, you can safely invest in stocks for their potential upside. The lower you set your living standard floor, the greater is your potential upside, and vice versa.
Summarizing the Strategy
With real (inflation-adjusted) interest rates higher than they've been since the Great Recession, you can now safely afford to spend more without having to take unnecessary risk. This strategy involves building a "TIPS ladder" — that is, a portfolio of individual Treasury Inflation Protected Securities that mature on different dates over the coming years.
Locking-in a stream of real income payments in retirement via a TIPS ladder can both safely cover your fixed spending and create a living standard floor. Surprisingly, this approach can also make investing in stocks less risky from a living standard perspective. By setting a comfortable living-standard floor using TIPS, you can effectively afford to take more risk with your remaining investments in hopes of increasing your living standard throughout retirement.


Retirement Investing Tip: Take a Look at TIPS

Jay Abolofia

Laurence J. Kotlikoff

Roger Daltrey wailed on The Who's first hit in 1965, "I hope I die before I get old." Fifty years later, Dr. Ezekiel Emanuel wrote a controversial essay for The Atlantic titled "Why I Hope to Die at 75." No, he isn't tired of living. Rather, his article examines the futility of staying alive as long as possible while burdened with years of poor health.
Over the past century, our average life span, how long we are alive, has increased by 20 years. Average health span, however, has not had a proportional rise.Recent data from the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) suggests that is precisely the direction most U.S. adults aged 55 and over are headed. 78% of adults in that category have one or more chronic conditions. The number jumps to over 85% for those beyond age 65. 
These grim statistics are reflected in the average number of years Americans live (76.1) compared to the entire decade less they can expect to enjoy total health. Experts call this yawning gap the difference between life span and health span.
Life Span and Health Span
How long do you want to live? According to an Edward Jones and Age Wave study, nearly 70% of Americans say the answer is 100 years as long as they still have their health and a sense of purpose.
"The focus is on adding life to years, not just years to life."
Life span, how long we are alive, has increased by 20 years over the past century due to advances in medicine, sanitation and overall living conditions. These impressive gains, however, have not been accompanied by a proportional rise in health span.
Dr. Xiaojing Yang, an expert on biological age quantification techniques at Mydnage, describes health span as "the portion of a person's life spent in good health, without significant diseases or disabilities that impair their quality of life. The focus is on adding life to years, not just years to life."
Maximizing health span means maintaining one's physical and mental health, preserving cognitive function and minimizing the impact of age-related diseases.
Why Maximizing Health Span Is Important
Beyond the importance of extending the quality of life for individuals, the societal and economic implications of health span are substantial. As people age and face increasing health challenges, health care systems and economies are strained by the greater resource demand.
Not to mention the drain on one's retirement savings. The average American household has managed to save $87,000. Meanwhile, experts estimate that a couple may need $445,000 to cover yearly medical expenses and long-term care.
By increasing health span, we can potentially delay or reduce the burden of chronic diseases, enhance productivity and financial stability in older populations, and improve the overall quality of life for individuals and communities.
How We Can Increase Our Health Span
We are born with a unique genetic code, but scientists are learning that our DNA is not necessarily our destiny. While our genes doubtlessly influence our dispositions and tendencies, the growing field of epigenetics focuses on "how behavior and environment can affect the way genes work," says Becca Roses of MindBodyGenes.
It is exciting to know, says Roses, that "unlike genetic changes, epigenetic changes are reversible and can be influenced by factors like diet, exercise, stress and sleep quality." 
"Increasing your health span comes down to increasing your quality of life through lifestyle choices." 
Dr. Scott Katzman, orthopedic surgeon at N.J. Spine and Orthopedic, agrees. "Increasing your health span mainly comes down to increasing your quality of life through lifestyle choices," he says. "While certain diseases and most accidents can't be avoided, you can improve your chances of vital participation in your own life."
What exactly are those choices? Ways to be proactive about one's health include avoiding obesity, avoiding tobacco use and having regular medical checkups. 
"One clear path is examining populations like the Blue Zones," says James Dixon, certified personal trainer at Fitness Brain in the U.K., "where large percentages of people live to be over 100 yet remain very active." 
Here are critical common denominators from Blue Zone populations around the world:
Diet is mainly plant-based. Daily consumption of legumes. Small portions of meat are served 4-5 times per month.Eating until 80% fullAlcohol is avoided or consumed in moderation (usually red wine)Active lifestyle with vigorous movement through walking, work and daily choresMinimize stress through prayer/meditation, naps and regular interactionExtended family structure and supportive social networksStrong sense of purpose and faith in a higher sourceBridging the Gap
No one wants to live to 100 wracked with constant pain, disease, mobility issues and loneliness. Beyond improving lifestyle choices, many experts agree that a shift in medical care is essential to bridge the gap between life span and health span.
"Medical care isn't presently designed for the long-term conditions that emerge once we leave the prime health span," says Tiryaki. Roses agrees, advocating "a shift in health care from a disease-oriented approach to one that emphasizes prevention and wellness."
Researchers and start-ups devote enormous time and money to answering this call. New drugs like Ozempic are helping combat obesity. Urolithin A, a postbiotic produced in our gut microbiome, is promising to help kill off damaged cells that accumulate during aging. A new drug is about to be approved by the FDA to increase the longevity of dogs!
Life span is the quantity. Health span is the quality. A cooperative effort between individuals and health care providers, with both parties pulling their share of the load, will ultimately yield the optimal result — years filled with abundant health, purpose and energy.


Life Span vs. Health Span

Edd and Cynthia Staton

On the day that Erma S. blew out the candles on her fiftieth birthday cake her life wasn't even half over. (At her request, we are not using her last name.)
Most Americans can expect to live 25 or even 30 years beyond the half-century mark, but the 102-year-old Colorado native suspected she would live well beyond that. She had longevity in her family.  
Americans 85 and older will number close to 20 million in the next 40 years.   "My mother and her sisters all lived into their 90s," she wrote in a snail-mailed letter to me, "so it was not a surprise that I might live that long."
Still, even as Erma moved from late middle age into old age, she anticipated the loss of contemporaries — her husband and several friends — but she didn't expect to endure the devastating deaths of a daughter-in-law and a granddaughter.
"My mother and her sisters all lived into their 90s, so it was not a surprise that I might live that long."
"Those were difficult times," she wrote. "I believe you take it the best you can at the time but it was hard losing them and I miss them."  
Erma also misses her independence. Both her hearing and her vision are greatly diminished and she says it makes daily life "much more difficult." Still, her days are punctuated by visits with family and friends, and she is grateful to have lived long enough to watch her great-grandkids grow up.
Erma S. is part of a remarkable transformation in the demography of this country. She is at the vanguard of a wave of 85+ year-old Americans who will number close to 20 million in the next 40 years.   
And the Census Bureau projects that among those millions of late-age older adults will be at least 500,000 people who are 100 years old or older.
Will most of those "senior" seniors be flourishing? Or will they be mired in ill health with chronic conditions and preventable disease?
Health Span vs. Age Span 
Bellevue Hospital physician Dave Choshki asserted in a September New York Times op-ed that Americans need to focus on a longer health span; the years of good health, rather than reaching some arbitrary age.  
The average American "can expect to celebrate only a single birthday in good health after the traditional retirement age of 65." 
He writes that global health estimates reveal that the average American "can expect to celebrate only a single birthday in good health after the traditional retirement age of 65." The metrics for the Japanese, Costa Ricans and Australians, for instance, project an average of a health span that reaches 70 years old.
Instead, Choshki suggests, the United States should aim "for a bold but common-sense national goal" of adding "a decade of healthy birthdays after retirement age."
Former Associated Press journalist (and grandson of a super-ager who lived to be 104) William J. Kole agrees. The author of a new book about centenarians, he said in an interview, "Any discussion of long life span has to be paired with a discussion of health span."
Kole's book, titled "The Big 100: The New World of Super-Aging," profiles late-agers like Jane Goodall who tells Kole, "Aging hasn't worried me, and death itself holds no fear for me at all." 
But I found "The Big 100" most intriguing when it delved into the scientific research of why a relatively few (but increasing number) of people live to be very old.
The 'Escapists' 
Dr. Thomas Perls directs the New England Centenarian Study. He told Kole that DNA and genetic markers associated with heart disease, diabetes, Alzheimer's and cancer seem to play a pivotal role in reaching 100 and beyond.   
"The older you get, the healthier you've been."
He calls the centenarians who have eluded all age-related diseases "escapists." Fifteen percent of people who live to 100 fall into this category. But there are a significant number of centenarians who have succumbed to cancer or heart disease earlier in their lives and survived it and who go on to live another ten or twenty years.
"The older you get, the healthier you've been," Perls says.
Which is why Kole, who spent fifteen years smoking, working long hours and eating too much, took up marathon running. He is making up for lost time.
When I ask him about the ignominy of having written about centenarians and then expiring before his 100th birthday, he laughs.
"Having written the book, I'm now obligated to live to 100."


Is Living to 100 All It's Cracked Up to Be?

Kerri Miller

Liz Elting was a 26-year-old graduate student in 1992 when she cofounded a business in her dorm room, a language-translation service that grew into a $1.1 billion company called TransPerfect. She cashed in her stake in 2018 but has no intention of retiring — and doesn't think you should, either.
Liz EltingElting established a charitable foundation (Elizabeth Elting Foundation) when she left TransPerfect, and she is still looking for opportunities, saying it's never too late for older adults to start something new. "They've learned a lot by the time they're 50 plus, 60 plus, 70 plus," she said in a phone interview. "They're much wiser. They've been through a lot. They have great experience."
"(Older adults are) much wiser. They've been through a lot. They have great experience."
Elting added that older adults are likely to be able to focus better because they've already focused on their career in a practical way. "They've gotten married, they've had kids, they're now empty nesters and can make it about what they're doing next in their time — not just what they should do to pay the bills and what they should do related to their children, taking care of them and being there for them," she said.
She cited the painter Grandma Moses as an example of a legend who did not blossom until she was in her 80s.
Elting read a book about a year and a half ago by Michael Clinton called "Roar: Into the Second Half of Your Life (Before It's Too Late)." Clinton writes in his book that there are about 90,000 people who are age 100 or older, but by the year 2050, there'll be over 600,000 who are 100 or older in the U.S.
"I think his point was it used to be that we would get into perhaps our 60s — age 65 or whatever the age is — and retire if we worked and then (face) a gradual decline until we passed away," Elting said.
Live Longer, Do More
Now, things are entirely different because people live much longer; they're much more high energy and much more useful. Elting said 60 is the new 30.
Elting sold her company when she was 52, and now, at almost 58, she feels like she is just getting started. She became an empty nester recently. When her kids were young, she focused on paying the bills and getting home from work at a reasonable hour to see them and take care of them. Now, Elting can focus on all the things she's always wanted to do but couldn't.
"Some of them involve business and some of them involve other things, but I feel like often your sixties (or later) is the best time to focus on starting a business or pursuing your passion," she said.
"If worse comes to worst and it doesn't work out, you've learned something, you've met some amazing people, you have some stories to tell. And then you go onto the next thing."
Elting said if there are things that you've always wanted to do but couldn't do, those risks are worth taking. The only reason not to take them, she said, is the fear that if you do it and lose everything, how are you going to put a roof over your head or feed yourself or your loved ones?
"As long as you can get by, if it doesn't work out, the risk is worth taking," she said. "Because if worse comes to worst and it doesn't work out, you've learned something, you've met some amazing people, you have some stories to tell. And then you go onto the next thing."
What do you need to start? Elting said you need yourself, your relationships "which you should always continually work on for a multitude of reasons — for your happiness, to live a longer, healthier life. And then in business, those relationships will pay off."
"Unlike years ago, you don't need a separate office," she said. "It's nice if you have a quiet place in your home, of course, but then you need obviously the equipment (the computer, the technology)."
Start Small and Nimble
The drive to get going and to enjoy it is paramount. "You do not need to invent something entirely new to be wildly successful," she said. "It's more about an idea of something perhaps that's already been done, but a way to do it a little differently and better."
You also don't need an elaborate business plan but more of an idea of what you want to do, a gap that you want to fill, a goal of what you want to accomplish (how big you want the business to be).
"You do not need to invent something entirely new to be wildly successful." 
Give yourself a deadline and then break that into smaller parts. "And then break that into smaller goals — yearly goals, quarterly goals, monthly goals, and then of course, the actions you need to do to get there," Elting said.
Discipline is key. "Many people who have wonderful ideas don't stick with it as far as certain actions they're going to take every single day to make sure they achieve their dreams," she said.
Elting doesn't believe in outside funding if you can avoid it because "then you're more careful with your money or whatever money you're working with. You don't need to spend a lot; it's more about your actions every day."
Where Opportunities Lie
What types of businesses does she see older adults starting? Service businesses — coaching or counseling services, writing, editing, graphic design, technology solutions.
Often the way to avoid health issues is by having a purpose. "The purpose is related to being an entrepreneur, starting your own business because what you're focused on probably involves interacting with people," Elting concluded. "A lot of it involves mental or intellectual stimulation. These things are so important in living a long, healthy life."
Socializing is key, but also continuing to learn new things. And by starting a new business and being an entrepreneur, you are continually doing things you've never done, and that's wonderful for your health.


The Benefits of Being a Late-Blooming Entrepreneur

Erin Flynn Jay

Bill McKibben has spent most of his life working to wean the world off fossil fuels, which, when burned, produce pollutants responsible for climate change and the catastrophic damage it causes.
Bill McKibbenHe has written 20 books, including "The End of Nature," the first to explain climate change to nonexperts. In 2021, he founded Third Act, a group for people 60 and over that demonstrates against energy companies and the banks that finance them.
After being named an Advocate for Aging, McKibben, who is 61, agreed to talk about some of the biggest issues older adults will face in this fractious election year. This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
On critical aging issues that are largely being ignored
I have to say something about climate change because it actually is something older people ignore, even though there's a lot of research showing that older people are the people most impacted by natural disasters. It's physically hardest for them to move when a hurricane's coming — hardest to uproot themselves, find someplace new and start over.
"The deepest question facing older adults is probably a variation on one facing us all: the loss of a sense of community in favor of a highly individualized world where it is every man for himself."
In a larger sense, the deepest question facing older adults is probably a variation on one facing us all: the loss of a sense of community in favor of a highly individualized world where it is every man for himself. I think that's acutely felt by older people because we have a vestigial memory of a different world before that. It's particularly difficult for older people who have any hope of, say, aging in place. That requires a functioning community around you to make that happen. So that's really one of the overarching things we work on.
On the inspiration to start Third Act for activists 60 and over
The fossil-fuel divestment campaign (organized by 350.org, a McKibben group that has attracted younger people) was largely on college campuses, so I got to know all the leaders of the Youth Climate movement in their very first campaigns. And then I got to know wonderful people like Greta Thunberg (a 21-year-old Swedish climate-change activist).
That was completely wonderful. I have just heard a few too many people my age say, "Oh, it's up to the next generation to solve these problems." That sounded to me both ignoble and impractical for all their energy and intelligence and idealism.
"If you're in your 60s or 70s or 80s now, your first act was in that period of great economic, cultural, social, political transformation of the 1960s and 1970s." 
Young people by themselves lack the structural power necessary to make change on the scale we need in the time we have. As I started thinking about who may have it, I focused on people my age. There are 70 million of us over 60 and 10,000 more turn 60 every day, which is as many people as are born in this country every day. And we punch above our weight politically because we all vote and we ended up with most of the country's financial assets to ensure we are in a good position to put pressure not only on political actors, but economic ones.
On rekindling older adults' belief that they can effect change
The conventional wisdom has been that it's useless to try and organize older people for progressive change because people become more conservative as they age, for which there's a certain amount of statistical evidence. But it seems less true all the time, and this is one of the key insights of our work with Third Act.
If you're in your 60s or 70s or 80s now, your first act was in that period of great economic, cultural, social, political transformation of the 1960s and 1970s. That's in our generational DNA. Our job at Third Act has been recapturing that as people come into their third acts. So far, we've been successful, both in terms of gaining members and winning fights. We've just come off this massive victory, persuading the Biden administration to stop granting permits for new LNG export facilities, which might be the biggest loss that Big Oil has taken yet.
On making an asset of one's age
We had this big campaign against the banks that fund fossil fuel companies. We shut a bunch of them down for a day in March 2023 — 100 demonstrations in 100 cities across America. We shut them down by sitting in rocking chairs. Hundreds of them all over the place. The Times called it the rocking chair rebellion.
On other ways older Americans can work to make things better
We don't think you can solve the climate crisis without also addressing the democracy crisis in our country. The challenges to the climate and to our democracy are two things we did not anticipate in our youth. We'll be heavily engaged there.
"Our trouble is that we don't have that time. Eventually is, you know, not fast enough."
On how to discuss climate change with people who don't believe in it
The polling shows about 70% of Americans understand that we have a real climate problem and, in fact, want the government to do more about it. Partly that's because movements have done a good job and partly that's because we've had so many fires and floods and other disasters — at a certain point you're going to ask, 'Who do you believe, Fox News or your own lyin' eyes?' The problem with climate at this point is making people aware that we can be doing important things as a society to speed up this transformation (to clean energy). That's a large part of our work, helping people feel their own power.
On what to expect in the near future
You know, we now live on a planet where the cheapest way to produce power is to point a sheet of glass at the sun. That's a miracle in physical terms, one of the biggest changes in our lifetimes. The only bigger physical change is the fact that we've just had the hottest year in the last 125,000.
These are such monumental changes that over time, economics alone will produce the transition that we need. Our trouble is that we don't have that time. Eventually is, you know, not fast enough. Because climate change is a timed test. Once you have melted the Arctic, nobody has a good plan for how you're going to freeze it back up again. And so we have a very few years to try to speed up this transformation, and that means things like enacting the Inflation Reduction Act, bolstering clean energy, and standing up to the fossil fuel industry.


Bill McKibben: Older Adults Can Save the Planet

Mark A. Stein

Maybe you're getting a tax refund this spring. If you can spare the cash, how about investing at least some of it in an underserved population where your dollars could do a lot of good? Girls' and women's nonprofits receive only 1.8% of overall charitable giving. How much more could they do with real funding?
"Giving women the resources and tools to succeed makes a huge difference in their families and their communities.""Investing in girls and women is a lever for economic progress here and around the world," says Una Osili, associate dean for research at the Indiana University Lilly Family School of Philanthropy. "By improving women's economic security, we invest in stability for the entire community."
"Investing in girls and women is a lever for economic progress here and around the world."
A small endowment this tax season is an investment in the next generation of creators, scientists, nurturers and community builders.
A Little Charity Goes a Long Way
As a few examples, these nonprofits focus on girls and women and have earned top-tier scores from the donor watchdog group Charity Navigator:
• Pink Ribbon Good gives practical support to women battling breast or gynecological cancer. A $50 contribution provides transportation to and from one cancer treatment session.
• Girlstart empowers girls in grades 4 through 8 through fun, informal STEM (science, technology, engineering and mathematics) education programs. A $100 donation supplies materials for a week's after-school program.
• Women, Food and Agriculture Network trains leaders, builds networks and offers education to women in sustainable food-systems development. A $150 gift supports a soil health and water quality workshop at a Women Caring for the Land event.
• The National Domestic Violence Hotline is the only 24/7 national, anonymous and confidential hotline for people affected by relationship abuse. Every $200 that is raised is enough to connect, on average, four survivors with a live advocate via phone, chat or text.
• Girls Who Invest diversifies an industry by offering Gen-Zers education, mentoring and internships in investment management; 69% are women of color. A contribution of $250 provides a week's meals during the Summer Intensive Program.
'A Gender Lens'
Giving USA, the publisher of an authoritative annual report on philanthropic fundraising and spending, doesn't break out donations to charities specifically for women and girls. But most nonprofits in the categories it does have, such as "religion," "human services," "education" and "health," serve girls and women generally already. You may ask why we need charities specifically for women and girls.
Osili, a Harvard graduate who earned a Ph.D. from Northwestern, says that "bringing a gender lens helps show disparities and specific barriers more clearly.
"Take education: Around the world, girls and young women often have no access to schools; opening classrooms to girls enables them to contribute more to society, so opportunity accelerates progress," Osili says.
"Opportunity accelerates progress."
In the United States, the lens might focus more on childcare. What most helps a low-income mother achieve a higher-paying job? Affordable, quality childcare so she can go back to school, Osili says. "But without a gender lens on the subject, we may be missing out on ways to accelerate solutions to the problems for which donors are giving."
Top philanthropists are thinking this way already. In 2007, through her charitable foundation, Oprah Winfrey made a point of creating the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls in South Africa, which continues to serve girls of poverty and promise. She calls it "my greatest legacy."
In 2015, Melinda Gates committed $1 billion to expanding women's power and influence in the U.S. and wrote a book, "The Moment of Lift," about "how empowering women changes the world."
Growing Funding Grows Girls
Take a look at just one part of the world: Los Angeles, where a group called the Los Angeles Women's Giving Circle has worked for years to research nonprofits and decide where to donate its members' pool of funds. An early choice was Motivating Our Students Through Experience, (MOSTe) which mentors girls from underserved neighborhoods to and through college.
Since 2007, the giving circle has donated tens of thousands of dollars to MOSTe, says Bonnie Davidoff, one of the group's founders. "Why? Because with double even a small income, a worthy nonprofit can pay staff better, so the staff stay on longer and hire a grant writer to bring in longer-term support for their work," she explains. Before such early infusions, MOSTe was all volunteer; now it has an executive director and three other paid staff.
With a growing number of donations of $100 to $150, says Amy Ludwig, who was MOSTe's executive director until February, MOSTe has been able to offer college visits, communication workshops (complete with instruction on how to give effective "elevator speeches") and career fairs to a growing number of recipients in 6th through 12th grade. There are 110 at present.
Altogether, the nonprofit has helped more than 2,000 girls and young women; 60 are currently in college. "Compared with peers of similar demographics — first-generation students of color from low-income backgrounds — our students graduate college at vastly higher rates," Ludwig says proudly.
"Once I've settled into my career, I hope to be a mentor for MOSTe," a young woman who signed on with the nonprofit as a seventh grader wrote late last year. Having made it successfully through high school and college, she is now teaching fifth grade at a Title I school in Los Angeles.
"Empowering women changes the world."
'Donors Can Make a Big Difference'
There is little research on "women's causes" and their big donors. The Lilly Family School Women's Philanthropy Institute (WPI) is one entity studying how gender shapes donor behavior. It has learned from fundraisers, donors and advisers as well as nonprofits' mission statements and programs about what they do and whom they serve.
Last October, WPI produced "The Women & Girls Index 2023: Measuring Giving to Women's and Girls' Organizations," the latest edition of data on charitable organizations dedicated to women and girls. It found that as of 2020, these nonprofits received only 1.8% of overall charitable giving, a figure that has barely budged. The good news? That total in dollars was up just over 9% from the year before.
"Issues affecting women and girls (for example, the gender pay gap, sexual harassment and assault) have received increased attention in recent years, but charitable giving to organizations addressing these issues lags behind," the report says.
'Individuals Can Make a Big Difference'
"While the state of funding for women and girls is dismal," it adds, "this also means that individual donors can make a big difference" for members of the Women and Girls Index (WGI), the only comprehensive analysis of charitable giving to organizations dedicated to women and girls in the United States.
WGI nonprofits tend to be smaller than average, both in funding and in staff, the report notes — and this offers an opportunity for small donors. "A lot of small organizations are trying to make a difference, and we can help them become more sustainable and increase their capacity," explains Dawna Cobb, a longtime Baltimore backer of nonprofits that support women and families. "Giving women the resources and tools to succeed makes a huge difference in their families and their communities."
"When I think of how I want to leave the world better for my daughter and grandchildren to come, it means — from a financial perspective — I'm helping countless people I do not know," says Texas-based philanthropy consultant Fayruz Benyousef, a longtime donor to and board member of the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
"When you think about your purpose, when you think of someone who helped you in a time of great need, you know that a gift to any organization that's helping women is a seed planted to improve lives forever."


Effective Philanthropy for Half of Humanity

Ellen Ryan

I live in a suburban New York town without the usual ways of making friends: growing up here, attending schools here, having children or hobbies. Impeded by an arthritic hip that currently prevents me from walking and hiking, I've found it really challenging to find kindred spirits who share my interests and who actually make time for new friends.
"There's a lovely and easygoing camaraderie, no one embarrassed to make a mistake, no one taking offense as others, kindly, offer corrections. In an era of widespread loneliness, our amitié is deeply comforting."Many women my age are already deeply committed to their own groups and pursuits: book clubs, canasta, mah jongg or grandchildren. I've never been much of a joiner, so it was a great relief to discover friendly, free, weekly meetings at a local library and a potential way to make new friends.
In French and Spanish.
As someone who speaks both, who grew up in Canada, and who has lived in France, Quebec and Mexico, I've finally found my people!
Every Wednesday at 1:00 six to 10 of us settle in around a long table, greeting one another with a cheery "Bonjour!"
Every Wednesday at 1:00 six to 10 of us settle in around a long table, greeting one another with a cheery "Bonjour!" For the next hour we enjoy lively, free-flowing conversation, all in French. The topics range widely, from our dogs (photos, too, of course!) to architecture, film and music. It is an amazing group.
There's Sarah, born in Palestine, 87, raised in the Congo, educated in South Africa, a retired art historian. Tall and elegant, she rode an elephant on her 75th birthday. Anne, in her mid-60s, who plays the lute and speaks Russian and German, has spent her career working with Leonard Bernstein's music and shared her insider's thoughts on "Maestro," the new film about his life, work and marriage. 
Maria is a former ballerina from California now working in health care. Helen, a widow who studied at the Sorbonne in her 20s, arrives every week wearing the intricate sweaters she hand-knits. Felicia, who left her native Chile to attend school in Switzerland, carved out a successful corporate career here – no small feat for a woman now 80.
At 36, Olga is the youngest, from Ukraine, a teacher of English as a second language. Naomi is Israeli, and at our meeting on October 11, 2023 gave us all a crash course in Israeli politics and history. Around that table, "the news" from a distant place few of us knew personally, suddenly became deeply emotional and personal.
French may have initially brought us together, but growing affection binds us deeper each week.
An Easygoing Camaraderie 
We're originally from Israel, Canada, Ukraine, Chile, Peru and Germany. As a Canadian who studied French from grade school through four years of university, and who worked in it as a journalist in Quebec and France, I arrived with an advantage. The four of us most fluent can tend to dominate, but there's also much "comment dit-on?" (how do you say?) as we all hastily refer to our phones or dictionary to translate. 
There's a lovely and easygoing camaraderie, no one embarrassed to make a mistake, no one taking offense as others, kindly, offer corrections. In an era of widespread loneliness, our amitié is deeply comforting.
A Switch to Spanish 
After a half hour to catch my breath, seated at the same table, I start an hour of Spanish with a wholly different crowd. There's Juanita, who fled the Cuban revolution as a child, Laure, a teacher from France, and Yuji, a retired former designer of complex switchboards who relaxes by ballroom dancing. So does Kenzo, a retired cook, who happily got up one week to demonstrate how soccer moves inform tango, one of his loves. 
A library staff member distributes a weekly reading, so we've learned about Peruvian potatoes, Argentine soccer, classical Spanish guitar and wine production in Uruguay. Each reading – thankfully — also has an accompanying vocabulary section to help us get through it as we puzzle over new-to-us slang or verbs. We take turns reading it aloud, then translate it.
Like the French group, it's a real mix of ages, backgrounds, professions and skill levels.
Like the French group, it's a real mix of ages, backgrounds, professions and skill levels.
One woman owns an apartment in Buenos Aires, while Kenzo, originally from Japan, lived for a while in Chile. I've visited Mexico many times, spent six weeks traveling alone through Spain and studied Spanish for four years at university. One woman is a former nurse, another used to teach high school English and journalism.    
Shared Curiosity 
Some are pretty fluent, others much less so and more hesitant, but we all seek something elusive – regular meet-ups with familiar faces, a growing shared history and a place to enjoy our love of other cultures and language. Thinking in another language is a brain workout in itself, let alone mastering pronunciation and acquiring new vocabulary.
Unlike popular solo online tools like Duolingo or Babbel, our groups are instantly and generously interactive. Many among us admit to having supposedly learned a language in school but emerged unable to actually speak it. Here, we do.
Many among us admit to having supposedly learned a language in school but emerged unable to actually speak it. Here, we do.
Whatever our individual skill level or age, we share some key qualities: curiosity about the world and other cultures, a hunger to keep learning and improving and a true global perspective.
Some of us have traveled widely and repeatedly to Quebec, France, Mexico, Central and South America and our groups also offer us a rare place each week to share some of our adventures and insights with people who really appreciate them. 
Some have also been immigrants in these countries, and later on in the U.S., adding an additional layer of mutual understanding and respect as we know what it's like to be ill or lost or flailing in another language in another country, maybe alone and long before the immediate aid of Google translate.
Two subjects we don't discuss — politics and religion. The potential rancor isn't worth it. As it is, we have quite enough to manage between six Spanish ways to say "hello" and French's brutal array of irregular verbs.
C'est une vraie pépite! (It's a real treasure!)


Friendship Is a Universal Language

Caitlin Kelly

Google anything related to health and wellbeing, and your search will turn up generic recommendations. These will range from the U.S. Department of Agriculture's MyPlate dietary resources to the CDC's suggested 150 minutes of weekly activity. You may also find academic studies, like Harvard's recent news brief discussing the importance of hobbies for older adults.
When you find a hobby that resonates, stick with it. Having a hobby at all might be more important than choosing the "right" one.Harvard's brief details a 2023 study. Examining nearly 100,000 adults over age 65, the researchers found that participants who engaged in hobbies had higher life satisfaction than those who did not. This was true across all 16 countries included in the study.
Interestingly, both the study and Harvard's brief highlight a few beneficial hobbies — all "gentler" activities like gardening, crafts and social clubs. This is unlike most generic "healthy hobbies" lists, which often focus on intense physical activity like tennis or ballroom dance, or mentally intense hobbies like knitting.
Examining nearly 100,000 adults over age 65, the researchers found that participants who engaged in hobbies had higher life satisfaction than those who did not. 
This focus on intensity might be lessening: Multiple studies have recently looked into the benefits of gentler hobbies. Thus far, the research has suggested that gentler activities come with a host of health benefits.
Recent Research 
Harvard's news brief is one of many sources discussing the health benefits of gentler hobbies. A second 2023 study linked five less intense hobbies with successful aging: gardening, reading, watching TV or listening to the radio, participating in social activities and playing cards or other games. Out of more than 7,000 older adults, those with these five hobbies tended to be more physically active, have better mental health and have higher cognitive function, compared to those with few or none of these hobbies.
A 2020 Japanese study linked certain hobbies to decreased dementia risk. Over six years, they surveyed more than 50,000 adults over age 65, and found that travel and playing ground golf (a Japanese game that's a cross between golf and mini golf) lowered dementia risk for men and women. The researchers also noted that "the risk of dementia was lower as the number of hobbies increased."
"Leisure, as a whole, is more powerful than breaking it down to individual activities."
Finally, a 2023 Australian study found that engagement with the arts benefited older adults' mental health. This could include anything from creating art oneself to experiencing others' art at an event like a concert or an exhibition. In an interview with Newsweek, one of the researchers recommended that adults who want to engage with the arts "take part in the art form that makes them feel good."
Though these studies all focused on gentler hobbies, they each identified different activities. What this might suggest is that participation in a hobby — any hobby — is more important than the activity itself.
Asking the Experts 
Heather Gibson, Ph.D., would argue just that. She said, "Leisure, as a whole, is more powerful than breaking it down to individual activities."
A professor in the Department of Tourism, Hospitality & Event Management at the University of Florida, and a fellow of the Academy of Leisure Sciences, Gibson co-edited the 2012 book "Leisure and Aging: Theory and Practice." She's studied activities ranging from sports tourism to girlfriend groups.
Much of her research has focused on women, so Gibson highlighted the importance of social connection for older women who are widows, live in rural areas or don't drive. In these scenarios, social networks might be challenging to build or maintain, but they're still "very, very important" for overall health.
Personalizing Your Activities 
Gibson further noted that, when you do see your social network, what you do together is less important than being together. Whether it's sports, a coffee date or chatting in someone's living room, "the context," she said, "or the 'who' you're spending time with is actually more important than the activity itself." This allows for a lot of personalization, in terms of individual activities.
"Gardening also comes with other benefits, like being outside in the sun and connecting with others who garden, such as neighbors or a garden club."
Elizabeth Vásquez, DrPH, also advocates for personalization. She's a proponent of physical activity due to its association with increased cognition, on one condition: the activity must be tailored to your individual ability, not a generic adult's. Can't walk the oft-suggested 10,000 steps a day? Don't give up on all movement: "Even a five-minute walk has benefits," she said.
An associate professor in the Department of Epidemiology and Biostatistics at the University at Albany (SUNY), Vásquez noted, "The way we evaluate physical activity among older adults needs to be reframed."
She used gardening as an example. "People don't think of gardening as a physical activity," she said, but it is. Planting seeds, watering plants and weeding each have a physical component, even if it isn't intense like competitive sports or weightlifting. Gardening also comes with other benefits, like being outside in the sun and connecting with others who garden, such as neighbors or a garden club.
"So it's not just the act itself," Vásquez said. "It's all the elements surrounding the act or the physical activity." Generic health guidelines don't always account for these surrounding elements, which, as Gibson argued, might be more important than the activity itself.
Generic guidelines also miss cultural differences. Vásquez, who is the director for the Center for the Elimination of Minority Health Disparities at the University of Albany, noted that many studies on older adults look at golf. "It's a very big thing among white Americans, but it's not as big among, perhaps, Latinos and African Americans."
Moving forward, Vásquez hopes that examining cultural differences will create "more culturally appropriate variations of physical activity." This could help more adults meet their activity goals. Her own research in this area includes a 2023 study on the racial and ethnic differences in physical activity, osteopenia and osteoporosis.
Things get murkier when it comes to how an individual's physical and mental abilities shift as they age. What happens when someone has a hobby that they can no longer enjoy? Devin Celeste Barth, a community occupational therapist and a Ph.D. student at Colorado State University, has seen older adults struggle to accept these changes.
Find a Hobby That Resonates
"There's a grief component that is often neglected throughout the aging process," Barth said. She sees gentler hobbies as one potential way to process this grief.
"Some of these 'gentler' hobbies are nice stepping stones to being willing to try something that maybe is uncomfortable or challenging." 
For example, she sometimes works with student veterans who are struggling with an all-or-nothing mentality. If they can't perform perfectly at school, why bother trying at all? When someone comes to her two weeks before finals with a mountain of incomplete assignments, she breaks down the big goal — pass the course — into a smaller one by asking, "Can we read two chapters in the next hour?"
When a student achieves a small goal, Barth calls this a micro victory. She sees gentler hobbies as serving a similar function for older adults. "Some of these 'gentler' hobbies are nice stepping stones to being willing to try something that maybe is uncomfortable or challenging," Barth said.
In short, it doesn't have to be your old hobby or nothing at all. When you're trying to find something new, an end goal of "Find a new hobby" might feel complex and abstract and if you aren't sure where to start, you might not start at all. A more manageable goal might instead be "Attend one art exhibition," "Try out a book club," or as Barth herself suggested, "Plan something with friends."
"It doesn't have to be a big plan like 'Bike across the city,'" she said, but trying one new thing, whether or not you stick with it, can give you the confidence to try it again. Maybe you'll become a member of that local book club. Or maybe the act of going — and then deciding it's not for you — can bolster you to try something else instead, like volunteering with a neighbor. Already you're making progress from that limiting "old hobby or nothing" mindset.
In the end, look for something that resonates. When you find it, stick with it because having a hobby just might be more important than choosing the "right" one.


The Benefits of Gentler Hobbies

Natalie Schriefer

When you're getting into shape, you often have some support along the way. You might find a running buddy, join a spin class or hire a personal trainer. Whether you've just begun caring for a loved one or are spending more time doing so as their health declines, many experts — from peers to professionals — can help you build your caregiving muscle, ensuring strength for difficult days ahead.
No matter what level of help you need, having someone by your side who understands your situation can significantly lower your stress and ultimately make life better for your loved one.You can find expertise in support groups, peer mentors, care managers, coaches and consultants. No matter what level of help you need, having someone by your side who understands your situation can significantly lower your stress and ultimately make life better for your loved one.
"Having people who understand caregiving in your support team means you're not learning everything on your own," said Liz O'Donnell, founder of Working Daughter, which helps women balance eldercare and their careers. 
Here's a closer look at a few of your options:
Peer Support
Loneliness can take a toll on your mental and physical health. Thirty-eight percent of caregivers in a recent AARP study reported that caregiving increased loneliness. "Caregiving is just inherently isolating," said AARP national caregiving expert Amy Goyer. 
"Caregiving is just inherently isolating." 
"It's a matter of not being able to fit much of anything else in your life, and the other aspect of it is the other people who have been in our lives often don't fully understand what we're going through."
Many organizations host free support groups where caregivers meet regularly to share stories and advice. They're also a place to vent with people who understand all too well what you're going through. Often, they have a specific focus, run by organizations such as the Alzheimer's Association, CancerCare or the ALS Association.
The Benefits of Support Groups 
In addition to in-person options, there are convenient virtual ones via platforms like Zoom and online communities available 24/7. The AARP Family Caregivers Facebook Discussion Group that Goyer moderates has 17,000 members who share their experiences and ask and answer questions ranging from whether to tell someone with dementia about a relative's death to what benefits are available to help defray costs. 
"I learned precious tips – just how to talk to somebody when they're distressed and lower your voice, get down to their level eye to eye, put your hand on their knee." 
O'Donnell's Working Daughter Facebook group focuses on women and men balancing caring for aging parents with their careers and the rest of their lives. During in-person or Zoom gatherings, moderators often enforce ground rules to establish a respectful environment and ensure everyone has an opportunity to speak, so quieter members don't get overlooked. 
In a good support group, there's no pressure to share more than you're comfortable with. "Some people say, 'I'm not a support group kind of person,'" Goyer said. "But many support groups stress the education aspect. You go there and learn and get resources and get help."
After Lisa Warren's husband Bill was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease, the couple, who lives in Orlando, Florida, joined a group designed for couples where one spouse was in the early stages of the condition. They learned valuable information and forged close friendships, gathering for lunches outside the regular meetings. 
As Bill's condition worsened, Lisa moved on to meetings for caregivers. "I learned precious tips – just how to talk to somebody when they're distressed and lower your voice, get down to their level eye to eye, put your hand on their knee," said Warren. "I've gotten so much out of support groups, and now, since I've been on this journey so long, I tend to be the one to offer advice and suggestions."
Faith communities, hospitals, disease associations, assisted living facilities and social service agencies are among the places that host support groups. Area Agencies on Aging can also help you find groups in your area.
Some organizations, including the VA Caregiver Support Program and the American Brain Tumor Association, offer one-on-one, peer-to-peer mentoring with current or former caregivers. Duet: Partners in Health and Aging, an Arizona-based nonprofit, connects caregivers nationwide with mentors who check in via weekly phone calls.
Caregiver Coaches and Consultants
For fees that vary widely — from as low as $40 an hour to over $100 — a coach or consultant can help you devise effective caregiver strategies. Topics covered in sessions include setting priorities, negotiating flexibility at work and dealing with difficult emotions.
Sascha Proudlove of Mountain Lake, New Jersey, started coaching sessions with O'Donnell after she began caregiving for her stepfather, who is in the early stages of dementia. "You get the advantage of the wisdom and the experience," said Proudlove, who gained valuable insights about managing her stepfather's care and "an incredible sounding board."
Coaches and consultants are often current or former caregivers themselves. Some undergo training and certification through various programs, including coaching organizations, the Society of Certified Senior Advisors or the Caregiving Years Training Academy, which has multiple designations, including Certified Caregiving Consultant.
When looking for a coach or consultant, "I recommend that a person look for someone who has had a similar life experience," said Caregiving Years Training Academy founder and owner Denise Brown, who also hosts an online community, Caring Our Way. "Then you'll both start from a place of knowing."
Many coaches and consultants will provide a free consultation to help you see whether they are the right fit. Like the fees, the frequency of sessions varies widely. Some clients have just a few throughout their caregiving journey. Others may meet every couple of months.
Geriatric Care Managers
These trained professionals work directly with older or ill people and their families to enhance their quality of life. Often, care managers are nurses or social workers focusing on aging and elder care; others may have a background in fields like physical or occupational therapy or health care administration.
"It's helped me increasingly to trust myself and feel confident I'm working with trusted advisers, and I'm not operating with knee-jerk reactions in a vacuum."
They are advocates for their clients, guiding families through health care and legal systems. They meet regularly with patients to monitor progress and can accompany them to doctor's appointments or set up meetings with assisted living or skilled nursing facilities to discuss care plans. 
They can help find resources like medication discount programs or mobile medical clinics. Their services include overseeing bill paying, coordinating government assistance, insurance and other benefits, helping families find senior housing and arranging respite care. These services often cost anywhere from $100 to $300 per hour — not including an initial assessment — depending on experience and location. 
Sometimes, care managers will work with families to offer pricing flexibility. But managers note that caregivers, especially those working or raising families, should consider the costs of their own time and lack of expertise in areas like qualifying for benefits or ensuring quality care in skilled nursing facilities.
"How much of your time are you taking off work and possibly not getting paid for it to navigate something you don't have a lot of knowledge in?" said Anne Sansevero, a New York care manager and president of the Aging Life Care Association, a nonprofit group representing care managers. Also, she noted, "sometimes care managers can save clients money in the long run" by helping them qualify for benefits.
The Aging Life Care Association has a nationwide directory of members, listing their levels of experience and expertise. Despite the name, these professionals also help younger people who have brain injuries, mental health problems or severe or chronic illnesses of any type.
Proudlove has enlisted the services of a care manager, as well as a coach, to help coordinate care for her stepfather, who lives in another state. Between the coaching and the care manager, she said, "It's helped me increasingly to trust myself and feel confident I'm working with trusted advisers, and I'm not operating with knee-jerk reactions in a vacuum."
Your caregiving support system could include clergy, social workers, volunteers, counselors and home and respite care providers. Brown suggests you assemble your team before you need it.
"Oftentimes when everything is great, we say, it's so easy," she said. "We neglect to spend time on our best day building support so that when we're really stressed out, we don't have to think about how to join a support group. We can connect to the relationships we know are good for us if we've done some research on our good days."


Building Your Caregiving Support Team

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