Romance novels have come a long way from the days of Barbara Cartland, when every cover seemed to feature shirtless white princes and windswept, gown-clad blondes. Now they're as likely to depict female CFOs, vampires, werewolves, Black entrepreneurs or millennials in jeans. 
We also have new kinds of romance writers. Personally more diverse, they also incorporate a wider range of subject matter and draw on a wider range of both work experience and love experience.
"You can still have taboo stories, but there's no more damsel in distress. Women have agency"To learn more about all this, we turned to four North American romance authors who've published hundreds of novels among them:
• Xio Axelrod, 56, Philadelphia-based USA Today bestselling author and songwriter, writes contemporary fiction, various genre romances and "strange, twisted tales." Indie rockers star in a series of her novels.
• Christi Barth, 53, a former wedding planner and professional singer, is the USA Today bestselling Maryland author of 47 romances. Her love of cooking may or may not be related to her foodie/wine-related novels. 
Xio Axelrod• Kathy Lyons (aka Jade Lee), 60, is an Illinois writer of 80+ books, including standard, historical, same-sex and paranormal romance and children's books. She's a former pro racquetball player who has even written about grizzly bear shifters.
• Kayla Perrin, 53, has written dozens of books that have been read in half a dozen languages — from romance, erotica and suspense to adult and children's fiction. The Jamaican-born Ontario resident is a USA Today and Essence bestselling author.
These authors graciously joined Next Avenue for a roundtable discussion on everything from modern characters and plots to the meaning of romance to what it takes to produce a romance of your own. Authors' responses have been lightly edited for length and clarity.
Next Avenue: How have modern romances changed from a few decades ago?
Barth: Women have power. And there's no more rape.
Axelrod: You can still have taboo stories, but there's no more damsel in distress. Women have agency …
Barth: … they have jobs, they've moved away from family, they have the ability to choose their own loving partner.  
Kathy Lyons/Jade LeePerrin: Their loving partner can be anyone. The modern romance has all kinds of characters from different cultures, different sexualities, different ages and so on.
Lyons: In the Barbara Cartland days, heroines were late teens or 20 and virginal, and heroes had to be men of status, which meant a titled lord. No one wants to see a teenager married off to a 40- or 50-year-old duke or marquis, so women started aging up, and the men started aging down.
Perrin: If you're in your 40s, been divorced, a single mom, a whole group of readers can appreciate that. Those people want a love story, too. They may not know it! That heroine is a little older, probably a little wiser, finding her happily ever after in fiction. Even "The Golden Bachelor" on TV — that tells you that people want to see stories of people at different ages falling in love.
Barth: Nowadays women don't save themselves for marriage, so that's in romances, too.
Axelrod: The sexual content includes consent. They talk about what they want. A good writer can make that sexy.
How has your own background informed your characters and situations?
Perrin: I'm a writer of color, and my characters are too. Before, there weren't characters who look like me. You don't feel excluded when you see yourself on the cover or when the characters wear braids or dreadlocks or dance to R&B and hip-hop rather than Alanis Morissette.
Kayla PerrinLyons: I've been hailed as the first author to write mass market Chinese romance. I get asked for these books, but the sales numbers aren't high enough for publishers to be happy. Harlequin has asked me to bring a Chinese character into England … we'll see what happens.
Axelrod: I'm married to a white man, so a lot of my characters are in interracial relationships. And as a Black female musician, I wrote into a series my experiences on the road. My heroine goes through a lot where she's dismissed for her race or gender.
Barth: When I performed in musicals and opera, it was two hours to let people escape and find that happy ending. Now I'm doing it as a writer. My first book had theater in it; I graduated to rock stars and pop stars. But that's like the frosting on a cake — romance is always at the heart of it.
Perrin: Burned by love, that's me. I'm now more guarded, but hopeful, and portray characters who are the same. Readers get it!
Why the popularity of subgenres like the paranormal, fantasy, sci-fi? Is 'pure' romance played out? Do authors want to expand?
Lyons: Readers want to expand. There's a flavor for everyone, which wasn't true before the '90s—military romance; every shade of mystery from the cozies to the more suspenseful; fantasy; vampires, then paranormal….
Barth: Pure romance is never played out. They all have the love story at base.
Christi BarthLyons: My first love is regency romance, which is like "Pride and Prejudice" with sex, but I've been published in just about every romance subgenre.
Perrin: It's so much more than men and women. People are happy to see diversity of love whether it's same-sex relationships or Hispanic or paranormal or whatever.
Axelrod: At any event you run into a guy at a bar who hears we're romance authors and says, "Huh, convince me to read a romance." We say, "Okay, what do you like to read?" Cowboys, sci-fi, dystopia, music, billionaires, suspense, sports … we can point to dozens and dozens of choices.
Perrin: Now I see Mafia romances are a thing!
Barth: "Historical" has its own subgenres, including regency, medieval and other categories, such as— would you believe — 20th century. Because romance readers now include those who were not alive in 1995. I almost swerved out of my lane when I heard that [in the car].
Lyons: Paperbacks were shelved in different physical areas of the store. With e-books, there are so many more crossovers — a lot of shading between genres. The internet is perfectly made for that.
Axelrod: Unfortunately, we're still fighting to get people to read Black and brown and queer authors, to read more diversely. If you love "that," of course you're going to love "this" — it's a romance with a happy ending!
What do fans most appreciate about modern romance novels?
Lyons: Whatever you want love to conquer, you can find it now. A heroine may be jailed for self-defense, or a child may be desperately ill — that's an "issue romance." Characters face real problems that readers face, too, and overcome them. They're people readers can identify with.
Barth: I call it the messy underbelly of life. That means little things as well, like having to pee after sex. Wearing glasses (no one did that in the old days). Shaving her legs before a date. Maybe someone is struggling to pay her bills.
Perrin: Women are unapologetically pursuing their own goals, often going head to head with the men. Some people put down romance novels, not seeing the power of the heroine. The heroine gets what she wants — often she tames the hero.
Barth: People absolutely use birth control in books now; if it's a genre that it might not come up in, like paranormal, there'll be a throwaway line: They couldn't get pregnant with another species, or they mixed an herb to prevent pregnancy. Otherwise, the reader thinks, great, when is the unexpected pregnancy going to happen? You don't want to distract readers like that.
"Go back to a romance from 1995, and it sounds dated. For instance, ghosting didn't exist then. Now it's written into bestselling books."
Also, I think they appreciate that we are evolving with them, keeping up with technology and trends. Go back to a romance from 1995, and it sounds dated. For instance, ghosting didn't exist then. Now it's written into bestselling books.
Axelrod: Readers appreciate that some authors are going back to change language or portrayals in their older books that now may cause offense. Everyone's trying to be more mindful and inclusive in their work, which readers appreciate because it shows growth.
What's your wisdom for potential writers out there? 
Perrin: Read a lot, and read what you want to write.
Axelrod: Read in your genre. Learn the conventions and what readers' expectations are.
Perrin: And write what you enjoy reading — not just because something is hot these days.
Lyons: Writing and publishing are a marathon, not a sprint. Write a little every day. Prepare for a long process.
Barth: Yup. Treat it like a career from day one. Make a schedule; act like you already have a contract. It will get you in the mindset.
Perrin: You can't just knock it off in a weekend. You have to know your craft. So many people get rejected by Harlequin because they just don't understand the basic structure of a Harlequin novel.
Lyons: Your agent and publisher will ask you, what book is similar to yours, how is it different, how is it doing on the shelf? You have to be prepared.
Barth: I've become so much faster. My second and third books took a year each. I do two or three a year now. Readers can not only read a paperback; they can listen, read on a phone or pick up a Kindle. They can access a book over more hours, so there's more demand for books.
Axelrod: Some people write on a strict schedule. Some write when they have open time. Some write on their phone while their kids play. You'll find what works for you.


Modern Romances Are More Diverse. So Are Their Writers.

Ellen Ryan

Fernando Torres-Gil is one of those achievers who's exceled in academia — he is professor emeritus of social welfare and public policy at UCLA — and in Washington. Presidents Carter, Clinton and Obama named him to high federal posts, including first-ever U.S. Assistant Secretary on Aging. He also was a White House Fellow and staff director of the House Select Committee on Aging.
Fernando Torres-GilAfter being named an Advocate for Aging, Professor Torres-Gil agreed to talk about some of the biggest aging issues the country currently faces.
This interview has been edited for length and clarity. 
On the least-discussed problem of aging in America
At the top of the list is caregiving, and the lack of home- and community-based long-term care services for all but the very poor. That should be at the top of the agenda, but other than among those directly impacted and their advocates, it does not get nearly as much attention as it should.
"We all are going to depend primarily on immigrants, refugees and low-income minorities to both sustain the entitlement programs financially and to provide the long-term care workforce."
On immigrants' impact on the U.S.
(Another) issue that doesn't get attention is the connection between aging and immigration. The reality is that in the years to come, we will need to replenish our workforce since native born Americans no longer reproduce themselves. We all are going to depend primarily on immigrants, refugees and low-income minorities to both sustain the entitlement programs financially (by paying taxes) and to provide the long-term care workforce. All the debates about immigration — on both sides — neglect to address this critical issue.
On looming trouble with long-term care
When I speak to audiences on long-term care, I ask them, 'How many of you think you might need help to take care of your grandmother or your disabled child?' Of course, everyone raises their hand. Then I ask them, 'How many of you can depend on your children to care for you?' Most people say, 'My kids will take care of me.' Then I ask, 'How many of you raised your children to become in-home supportive services workers?' Of course, no one raises their hands because they want the kids to be engineers, tech billionaires, doctors, lawyers and so on.
The point is, we don't value that kind of work. Somebody's going to have to help you when you can't care for yourself, and who might that be? Immigrants, refugees, undocumented persons and low-income minority women — persons we value less.
We have a (caregiver) labor shortage now. Young caregivers now will not work for $12 an hour to take care of a disabled person, not when they can go to In-N-Out (a chain of restaurants) and get $18, $19, almost $20 an hour and be better treated, have health insurance and have a job that doesn't wear them down physically.
On legislative efforts to address these problems
"There is already excellent advocacy on behalf of the long-term care of the workforce and the need to put caregiving higher on the policy agenda."
There is already excellent advocacy on behalf of the long-term care of the workforce and the need to put caregiving higher on the policy agenda. In fact, President Biden and his administration adopted a caregiving long-term care plan to provide more support for families who are taking care of elders and disabled persons and has support for home care workers. So, the good news is it does get to the top of this administration agenda, which means more folks understand the importance.
Here in California, caregiving is at the top of our agenda, and we have full support from the governor and the legislature to enhance compensation for long-term care workers and to move toward what we hope might be public financing for caregiving and long-term care.
On how aging issues will be treated in the election
It's going to be strictly mudslinging, distortions and lies, no substantive discussion. However, both sides will demagogue Social Security and Medicare. Both sides will talk about how they're going to protect Social Security Medicare, but no one will talk about the realities of how to address financial shortfalls and how to expand benefits under those programs.
"The Older Americans Act is the only federal program to provide community-based supports, which are essential for giving individuals options to stay in their home state or community."
On reauthorizing the Older Americans Act
The Older Americans Act is the only federal program to provide community-based supports, which are essential for giving individuals options to stay in their home state or community. It's an extraordinarily successful program, ranging from elder-care support services to ombudsman to congregate meals, to transportation, and so on. And it has a well-organized Aging Network as an infrastructure. But it's been extraordinarily underfunded. The real priority is expanding overall funding.
The good news is that least some years back, we in the disability community teamed up with the aging community at AARP and we brought together programs for older persons and younger disabled through the Administration for Community Living, ACL. So, with the Older Americans Act, keep it as it is and just add more funds and strengthen the authority and reach of the Administration for Community Living. It works.


Fernando Torres-Gil: Fixing the Caregiver Shortage

Mark A. Stein

Elephants have the largest number of olfactory reception genes, twice that of dogs and five times that of humans.Since time began, a keen olfactory sense has been critical for mammals to find food and mates and avoid predators. African elephants top all mammals with theirs. These giants have the largest number of olfactory reception genes, twice that of dogs and five times that of humans. 
A sense of smell is important for the survival and stability of humans, too. Researchers from the University of Pittsburgh recently discovered that familiar scents may foster specific autobiographical memories (AM) in humans and potentially assist in depression recovery. Individuals with Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) often have a deficit in recalling specific autobiographical memories.
A sense of smell is important for the survival and stability of humans.
According to the National Institute on Health, 8.3% of Americans will suffer from Major Depressive Disorder at some point. While depression is much written about, it's devastating to think that someone in a dark place may also miss the memories of grandmother's homemade yeast rolls cooling on a marble-topped cabinet or the pungent, sweet odor of making caramel apples. Or the smell of hot dogs from a vendor's box in the stands at a baseball park. 
Dr. Kymberly D. Young was part of a team from the University of Pittsburgh Medical School that published a study in JAMA Network Open in February, suggesting that positive memories can be elicited from MDD patients with odor-based cues. 
Young gave a personal example during a Zoom interview with Next Avenue, using coffee's strong, familiar smell in a coffee shop. "I go to Starbucks every Friday," she said. "I went on a blind date there where I met my husband. I often reminisce about the positive emotions, first impressions and nervousness." 
Young continued, "I've always been interested in autobiographical memories. When memory fails, people with depression are unable to recall a specific memory, according to MRI studies. "In depressed people, the amygdala (fight or flight response) didn't come on for positive memories."  
The study noted that processing olfactory information is important to humans in assessing the environment — not exactly for the same reasons as wild elephants, but still important. "The olfactory bulb directly projects to several structures in the brain implicated in memory and emotions, including the amygdala and hippocampus, allowing olfactory information to enter the limbic system directly," noted the study. This routing makes the information available for reaction quickly. 
No Paint Thinner or Gasoline
Thirty-two adults with Major Depressive Disorder and a mean age of 30 participated from September 2021 to November 2022. Study members were asked to recall memories from 24 items, both word and odor cues, and the odor cues were rated more arousing (not in a sexual sense) and vivid than word recall.
How did the researchers choose what odors to include?
"We found a reviewed paper done in healthy individuals that identified their most common smells," Young explained. "We obviously eliminated paint thinner and gasoline," she added, noting her employer would not have appreciated them. Cinnamon and coffee were two of the popular smells, and coconut, 26 odors total for the test purposes.
Dr. Kymberly D. Young's glass jarYoung explained that odors can elicit different responses in different people. For example, "In some people, the scent of coconut produces a memory of cake. In me, I think of being at Disney with sunscreen in my eyes."
Participants were given cues and asked to produce a specific memory. The example explained that coffee should not be a generic memory of coffee sipped daily but rather a special memory associated with coffee, such as Young's personal example about meeting her husband. If no response was given after 30 seconds, the proctor recorded no memory. All words were captured in the memory.
Half the cues were presented as odors and half as words, the odors in tiny screw-top opaque glass jars, changed frequently to keep the freshness of the odor. In the word part, the proctor read each word.
The Scents Make Sense
Much clinical work has been done on odors and healthy people, but this may be the first study to undertake such research on persons diagnosed with MDD. Young reported that the study found results similar to studies done with healthy individuals, that odor-cued memories were recalled more than word-recalled memories by study participants.
Odors can elicit different responses in different people.
The study concluded that "these preliminary findings could have implications for furthering management options for MDD."
Young added, "The conventional wisdom has been that people with depression don't have positive memories. One of the most important things out of this study is that it suggests that depressed people have the memories but cannot access them. If we can help them access their positive memories, they can use them in daily life. The memories are there; you just need a better way to access them."
"Outside of a therapeutic setting, I can see people sitting down with different odors and immersing themselves in their memories," Young noted. "You are more easily able to recall a memory with practice."


Why Familiar Scents Can Boost Your Mood

Amy McVay Abbott

Vitality is the key to overall health, allowing us to pursue life with strength and energy. As we age, maintaining vitality becomes an even greater priority to ensure a fulfilling and active lifestyle. The good news is older adults believe themselves to have higher levels of vitality than other demographics, according to a study by Cigna. 
There are numerous strategies and lifestyle choices that can significantly improve vitality and promote a healthier, more vibrant life full of energy and joy for years to come. Start with small, actionable steps you can take every day to feel healthier, stronger and more engaged – at home, with friends and family and in your community.  
Consider some of these essential tips to fuel your vitality: 
Cultivate your purpose. Prioritize activities and connections that bring you fulfillment and joy. Dedicate time to your mental well-being and passions – even small adjustments, such as pursuing creative or aspirational hobbies, can enhance a greater sense of purpose. 
Contribute to your community. Embracing altruism is a powerful tool for personal growth, and actively participating in acts of kindness or community service will improve your positive outlook and foster a deep sense of belonging. Volunteering with friends and family offers a wonderful opportunity to strengthen bonds and build connections. Consider activities at your local YMCA or exploring community-based volunteering opportunities to get involved. 

Prioritize your health by not neglecting preventive screenings. Be proactive with your preventive care so you can stay healthy and active. Consult with your doctor about important screenings based on your age and health status. 
Practice reflection. Take 10 minutes out of your day to journal positive aspects of your day and areas for improvement or go for a brisk 10-minute walk to boost your energy level and contemplate your thoughts. 
Choose healthier snacks. What you put into your body directly impacts your vitality. Set yourself up for success by making good food choices. Have healthy snack choices on hand, such as in-season fresh fruits and pre-cut vegetables. Stay hydrated with water and tea rather than sugary drinks. 
Embrace learning. Choose a topic or skill that intrigues you and delve into it. Learning something new not only boosts confidence and happiness, but also stimulates brain health. This includes learning about the right health plan for you. If you're close to Medicare eligibility, you probably have lots of questions. Athlete, entrepreneur and philanthropist Earvin "Magic" Johnson Jr. is 64 years old and at "rookie" status when it comes to Medicare. The Cigna spokesman advises rookies like him to talk to the pros to learn about their Medicare options. 
"Learning is a lifelong process," Johnson said. "Many times in my life I've entered into new ventures and had to draw upon the experiences of experts to help me make wise decisions. That's true of Medicare as well. I appreciate that Cigna provides thorough insights and information so I, along with many others, can make the most of my health and vitality well into the future." 
And even if you are already a Medicare pro, you should compare plans and benefits each year during the Medicare Annual Enrollment Period (AEP), which runs from October 15 - December 7. For more details, visit CignaMedicare.com. 
Incorporating these tips into our daily lives can enhance vitality. Start small, be consistent and celebrate each milestone on the path to a more vibrant and fulfilling life! 
Cigna Healthcare products and services are provided exclusively by or through operating subsidiaries of The Cigna Group. The Cigna names, logos, and marks, including THE CIGNA GROUP and CIGNA HEALTHCARE are owned by Cigna Intellectual Property, Inc. © 2023 Cigna Healthcare. 


Why Vitality Is the Key to Aging Well

Dr. J.B. Sobel, Chief Medical Officer for Cigna Healthcare’s Medicare business

Interest in international travel continues to trend upward, as evidenced by the record 24 million passports the U.S. State Department issued in the year that ended last September. Air travel measured by passenger kilometer-miles grew globally over 40% in the post-peak-COVID year 2023, approaching pre-pandemic levels, and is expected to surge again this year.
Airfares are cheaper now than they were this time last year. Fares in March 2024 were 6.1% lower than they were in February 2023, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics.If you are planning to travel abroad this year, how will this increased demand affect your budget?
Here is a look at what experts project for 2024 regarding the cost of flights, accommodations and cruises, along with tips to get the best deals on your trip.
Airfares: Buckle Your Seat Belt
In response to high traveler volume, airlines have increased flight schedules and routes serving international flyers. These actions are in addition to natural adjustments made after the pandemic forced drastic reductions in 2020. New low-cost airlines like Norse Atlantic Airways and Wizz Air help bring prices down industrywide.
If you are in no hurry to arrive at your destination, flights with long layovers are often cheaper.
As a result, airfares are cheaper now than they were this time last year. Fares in March 2024 were 6.1% lower than they were in February 2023, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. They are even slightly lower than the pre-pandemic rates of February 2020.
Even better news: the American Express Global Business Travel Air Monitor 2024 report predicts prices on certain international routes may drop as much as 12%. That does not necessarily mean you should delay booking flights in hopes that fares fall further.
Finding Affordable Air Fares
Book in advance: The days of low-priced last minute flights seem to be over. Airlines now offer the deepest discounts months ahead.Be flexible with dates: Flying midweek or during off-peak hours can yield lower prices. If you are in no hurry to arrive at your destination, flights with long layovers are often cheaper.Use fare comparison tools: Websites like Skyscanner and Google Flights help you find the cheapest options. Set fare alerts to receive notifications when flight prices drop.Lodging: Rates through the Roof?
After the pandemic, hotels were understandably focused on filling as many rooms as possible. Now that travel has once again stabilized, it seems the focus is shifting to properties being willing to accept lower occupancy in exchange for increased room rates.
The months right before and after peak season offer the same great weather with smaller crowds and better prices.
Many countries have, like the United States, struggled with high inflation in recent years. This lower occupancy/higher rates strategy can actually increase profitability since lower occupancy helps reduce hotel operating costs.
BCD Travel's Q4 Travel Marketing Report forecasts that international hotel rates will climb by 6.8% in 2024. Amex GBT's Hotel Monitor 2024 paints an even grimmer picture, predicting rates rising as much as 17.5% in some cities.
How Save on a Place to Stay
Travel during shoulder season. The months right before and after peak season offer the same great weather with smaller crowds and better prices.Stay further away from major tourist attractions. You will pay top dollar for a hotel next to the Louvre in Paris. Consider a much cheaper property a few miles away that is close instead to public transportation (excellent, safe and inexpensive in many countries).Consider alternative accommodations. Lodging sites like Airbnb and VRBO can be a great option to a traditional hotel stay. Choices range from private rooms to entire homes. Be sure to read reviews from previous guests, and never hesitate to reach out to hosts for more information.Cruises: Full Steam Ahead
Cruising has never been more popular. According to the Cruise Lines International Association, the 31.5 million passengers who set sail last year will be eclipsed by 35.7 million expected passengers in 2024. Demand is so strong that some smaller operators like SeaDream Yacht Club have already opened bookings for the fall season of 2026.
This high demand coupled with increased operating costs means the days of cheap cruises may be ending. Prices overall for 2024 are up 8% from 2023 and between 17.5% and 22.5% from 2019.
Still, cruises continue to be a great value compared to land-based vacations, since hotel and resort prices have increased 40% to 50% compared to 2019.
Tips to Land a Cruise Deal 
Be flexible. Zeroing in on a specific sailing date and cruise line eliminates all possibilities of finding a better price.Book early. Many cruise lines offer their best prices and sometimes extra perks when itineraries first go on sale. Also, you are more likely to get your top choice of cabins and dining times at specialty restaurants.Use a travel agent. Agents who specialize in cruises can be a valuable asset. They often have first access to sale prices, and larger agencies sometimes negotiate group space at lower rates, which could save you money on your fare.Bonus: New Fees to Watch For
Several European cities plagued by overtourism are charging an extra fee to visit. Amsterdam has the highest tourism tax in the EU — 12.5% per night for overnight visitors (average €21.80) and €11 for cruise passengers. Visitors to Barcelona are hit with a regional and city charge. These add up to €6.75 per night for high-end hotels and €6.25 for cruise passengers.
Venice banned cruise ships in 2021. Now, in addition to an overnight tax collected by hotels and Airbnbs, the city has begun using this online portal to charge day trippers €5 to enter the city on specific days.
Let's be honest. These modest fees won't prevent anyone from coming, but they present an opportunity to increase tax revenue for popular destinations whose residents are becoming increasingly fed up with hordes of tourists upending daily life.
The cost to visit two locations in South America has recently doubled. The visa fee for U.S. citizens traveling to Brazil has jumped from $80 to $160, and the entry fee for most nationalities to enjoy the unique wildlife on Ecuador's Galapagos Islands increased from $100 to $200.


Foreign Travel Costs Are Poised to Soar

Edd and Cynthia Staton

It's easy to get stuck or find holes you can't fill when researching your family tree. That's where genealogy libraries and most importantly, their highly trained staff librarians, can get you going again.Searching for your roots to answer the ultimate questions about identity — who am I and where do I come from? — is a popular hobby. But it's easy to get stuck and discouraged in your search, even with the hints provided by Ancestry.com and other genealogy companies, or to discover that you've been led down the wrong path, which can be maddening considering how much time genealogy searches can take.
"Our librarians provide their services for free to all comers over the phone, via email and in person."
That's where it pays to call on a genealogy center, says Curt Witcher, director of special collections at one of the country's top genealogy research centers at Fort Wayne, Indiana's Allen County Public Library.
"Our librarians provide their services for free to all comers over the phone, via email and in person: People who are just beginning to trace their roots, those who've been searching for a while and even professional genealogists," he reports.
Start With Your DNA
If you're new to genealogy — or even if you've already started a search and compiled a family tree — consider taking an Ancestry.com DNA test (cost $59 and up), which can reveal your family's origins going back hundreds of years, says Allison DePrey Singleton, genealogy services manager at the Allen County Public Library. It's estimated that 30 million people, mostly Americans, have already taken DNA tests to find their ethnicity.
Overall, 99.5% of DNA is identical for all human beings, but the other 0.5% contains variants that are associated with specific ancestral groups, ethnicities and regions of the world. 
All you need to do is order the test online and return a sample of your saliva. Ancestry is preferred to other companies, such as MyHeritage.com, which requires a cheek swab, and 23andme.com, which uses a salvia sample, that provide similar services but don't have databases as large as Ancestry.com's, she says.
Linking Your DNA to Specific Regions
Each individual inherits half of their DNA from their mother and half from their father. Overall, 99.5% of DNA is identical for all human beings, but the other 0.5% contains variants that are associated with specific ancestral groups, ethnicities and regions of the world. 
Ancestry compares your personal DNA sample to these reference populations, which allows the company to draw conclusions about your family's origins and create a report for you. For instance, my DNA links me to reference populations in Scandinavia (29%), Finland (12%), Ireland (17%) and western and eastern Europe. I even have a tiny bit of Neanderthal DNA (as most of us do!).
Beyond that, Ancestry.com has compiled 27 billion historical records and 100 million family trees, which can further help to pinpoint the regions, countries and sometimes even counties, towns or villages where your ancestors lived.
Getting Help from Genealogy Libraries
Once you have received your DNA information from Ancestry.com, the real work begins in searching for family records and creating a family tree. And while it's easy to be gung-ho at the start of a search for your ancestors — and the genealogy companies do a great job of providing videos and written information on how to conduct a search — it's equally easy to get stuck on your journey or find holes you can't fill. That's where genealogy libraries and most importantly, their highly trained staff librarians, can get you going again.
Where to Find Genealogy Centers
In addition to the Allen County Public Library, there are other top genealogy libraries in the United States, and most if not all offer their services free of charge, says Witcher. One of the biggest genealogical libraries in the world is the FamilySearch Library in Salt Lake City. It is open to anyone, but owned by the Church of Jesus Christ of the Latter-day Saints, whose members are guided by a moral imperative to connect families across generations.
The Genealogy Center in Allen County Public Library, Fort Wayne, Indiana Most of the libraries have searchable websites and may offer virtual programs and classes on how to conduct searches. Some genealogy centers offer email and telephone services. Many have digitized records, while others have collections and databases that can only be searched when you're actually present in the library. 
The information can include Census data, immigration records, passenger manifests, birth and death indexes, marriage and divorce certificates, military service records, newspapers, maps, court records, church memberships and school yearbooks.
Many genealogy searchers plan vacations and trips around visiting certain centers to comb through their stacks of records. For instance, if you know that your great-grandparents lived in Indiana, it makes sense to visit the Allen County Library, which gets about 35,000 visitors a year who come to search through The Genealogy Center's physical collection of 1.2 million volumes covering all of North America — a collection that grows by 1,000 items a month — as well as access various databases and their library subscriptions to sites like Ancestry.com and MyHeritage.com.
"It's so much fun to go beyond when and where people were born, married and died and discover the actual stories behind the history."
Singleton advises having a specific focus at each step of your search and when you visit a library rather than using a scattershot approach. For example, you might first focus on your paternal grandmother or grandfather's origins, or you might look into the maternal side of your family. The librarians can point you to area-specific historical records to thumb through, as well as scan or copy.
 "We will teach you how to do the research and where to look," says Singleton, "but we won't do the actual work for you." That's partly because the librarians, although they are passionate about their jobs, don't have the time to research each person's genealogy and partly because they want patrons to experience the joy of the search themselves. 
"It's so much fun to go beyond when and where people were born, married and died and discover the actual stories behind the history," she says. "These people often had interesting lives!"


Hit a Roadblock in Researching Your Roots?

Nancy Monson

Ethel Krinsky wants me dead.
Not right away. Not until I put down a $3,500 deposit on my burial plot.
Ethel also wants all my financial information: bank accounts, stocks, bonds, IRAs and all my revenue streams. I'm surprised she hasn't asked for my passwords. I assume that's coming.
"I figured funeral/burial shopping would be easy, and I told Amy I'd handle it."Ethel seems like a caring woman, but I can't help but wonder about the commission she'll make on my death. After all, Ethel is in the funeral business. And unlike my Toyota dealer, she doesn't have return customers. With Ethel, I'm one and done.
"Too far. Too country. I'm a city guy."
Until my friend Davy died suddenly of a heart attack, I hadn't seriously considered my final resting place. Davy was the first friend I made when I moved to LA in 1979. He was my confidant, racquetball partner, breakfast buddy and a man I admired and loved.
After his funeral, I began to think more seriously about the day when either I, or my wife, Amy, dies. I figured funeral/burial shopping would be easy, and I told Amy I'd handle it.
"What about where Davy's buried?" she asked. "It's beautiful."
"Too far. Too country. I'm a city guy."
To my surprise, I found a cemetery minutes from our house that checked four boxes: Jewish cemetery, urban setting, offering green burials, convenient for my kids to visit.
When I told Amy, she told me she'd always thought she'd be cremated and have her ashes spread off Cape Cod, but as we were driving to the cemetery, she said, "Turns out cremation's bad for the environment."
"Well, I'm not getting cremated. The Jewish tradition doesn't allow it."
"You don't keep any of the traditions," she argued. "I'm keeping that one," I said.
Paging Through Information 
Ethel Krinsky greeted us, handed us masks and information booklets and we began to talk. As she and Amy discussed green burials, I flipped through the booklet to get my bearings.
Basic Services: $4,000
Caskets: Price range - $1,250 to $15,000
Video Montage: $700. I figured I'd pick out some still photos in advance and ask my daughter to bring them to the service and place them in the entryway, next to the:
Register Book: $225
Shomer: $30 an hour (12-hour minimum) $360. The shomer sits with the body and prays. I don't need anyone sitting with me. I'm not going to be going anywhere.
Eventually Ethel handed us off to Dov, and we followed him outside, over to the green burial section. The cemetery was as expansive and manicured as the loveliest golf courses; the green burial area, the size of a pickleball court, was tucked far away, at the edge of the property.
I immediately liked it. It was green, and it felt tranquil and private, feelings I'm always after.  
Left With Many Questions 
Dov, a kind, middle-aged man, smiled at us as he spoke admiringly of the ecological benefits of green burials. I was ready to sign when Amy pointed at the wall across the way. "Tell us about that," she said.
"Compartments at eye level start at $17,000. As you move up or down the wall, the price decreases."
It was a wall crypt divided into hundreds of compartments that looked like safety deposit boxes. "For those who choose cremation, your urn can be stored here," Dov said. "Compartments at eye level start at $17,000. As you move up or down the wall, the price decreases."
"So for the top row where someone has to climb a ladder to slide in the urn?" Amy asked.
"Twelve thousand."
I looked at Amy, wondering how she was feeling but not wanting to ask until we were alone. Still, I had to be honest.
"I love the green burial," I said. "No pine box. Just a shroud. Simple. Dust to dust. I love that. How much for a green burial?"
"Two prices," Dov said. "Depending on whether you wish to have an individual plot or a double."  
"Next to each other?" Amy asked.
"One on top of the other," Dov explained.
"So, if I die first, I get the bottom bunk?" I asked. "Exactly, and it's cost effective," Dov smiled.
Amy and I both cocked our heads. "How much?"
"40,000 for one plot, $60,000 for a double."
Amy and I had been holding hands, and now, for the first time, I squeezed hers. It was a signal for "Let's go."  
As we drove home, we were quiet until I blurted out, "Forty for one. Sixty for two. They're bundling. Like Spectrum or T-Mobile."
I've lived in LA for 44 years, but that day I understood that I can live here, but I can't die here —not without dropping fifty grand on a small piece of land I can't build on.
Ever since our cemetery tour, Amy and I have been discussing our options. We've talked about my family's plot in Houston, but I spent my entire youth trying to get out of Houston, and I'm not going back. We've talked about Amy's family's plot in Cleveland, but I've never been a cold weather guy. 
And besides, whichever of us survives the other will have to arrange transporting the other's body halfway across the country, while mourning. Seems complicated, expensive and sad. The whole point of this pre-planning was to ease the burden on the surviving partner. Alas, we've hit a wall.
For our ages, 72 and 71, we're in excellent health, but we both know that could change in a flash. And if and when either of us faces a serious health problem — which seems inevitable —care will impact our finances, and everything else.
A Familiar Option 
Recently, Ethel Krinsky called to check in. I told her we were still discussing, but that her place was too expensive. She suggested the cemetery where her friend, Ailene, works. It's the place my pal Davy is buried.
And maybe, this is where we'll eventually end up. Our plots, side by side, facing a mountain, way out of town.
Ethel gave me Ailene's number, and when I called she crooned about their acres of beautiful space. "Wherever you're standing on our property, you have a mountain view. And we have many options, in many price ranges," she said.
"So I hear."   
"Next time you come to pay respect to your friend, please drop by my office."
"Thanks. We will," I said.
Ailene's place doesn't check all the boxes, but Amy and I are planning to drive there, place a stone on Davy's headstone, walk around. I'll talk about how much I miss my friend, how his loss has left a hole in my heart.
Amy and I will hold hands and check out the mountain views and read the engravings on people's headstones. And maybe, this is where we'll eventually end up. Our plots, side by side, facing a mountain, way out of town. Near my best friend. 


To Live, but Not Die, in LA

Dennis Danziger

In athletics, "peaking" means applying supreme effort at the exact right moment to achieve maximum success.
Recently retired and approaching seventy, I've become a late bloomer, a "late peaker," so to speak. Benefiting from the dual gifts of good health and, with work less prominent, the time to enjoy it, I'm catching up on the experiences, like Western skiing and hiking Colorado's high peaks, that I'd postponed for decades.
Jeff ZilkaWhat makes these activities possible, of course, is that I'm still physically able.
After long suspecting it would complement my enjoyment of the outdoors, I took up fly fishing at 64.  
A half-century ago, after graduation, I envied three fraternity brothers, all avid outdoorsmen, who'd skied Utah's Alta and Snowbird and hiked the Haute Route in the Alps. Today, one once-vigorous athlete has Parkinson's; a second has new knees and cannot ski; and a third fell victim to a cancer that took his life as he neared fifty. I'm thus deeply grateful to be alive, living my long-fantasized outdoor life.
I grew up an urban, middle-class kid in New York City. I hadn't traveled much west of the Hudson by the time I started college. Early-career business trips to far-flung Chicago and Minnesota moved my meridian westward, and I saw my first Western slope in my early 30s, when my wife and I trekked to Park City, Utah.
First Step: Fly Fishing 
Imagine my delight that here in my adopted home of Santa Fe, New Mexico, the trail to the top of Atalaya Mountain, a beloved 9,100 feet peak with a commanding view, is only seven minutes away.
Recently, several authors — among them Tom Vanderbilt, Nell Painter, Rich Karlgaard and Margaret Talbot – have advocated for acquiring a new skill later in life; that the experience of progressing from absolute beginner to proficiency not only adds to one's enjoyment of life's richness, but promotes mental agility. In that vein, after long suspecting it would complement my enjoyment of the outdoors, I took up fly fishing at 64.  
Starting was easy. Three times a year, one of Santa Fe's fly shops partners with the local community college to offer a popular "introduction to fly fishing" course. I signed up and the next four Saturday mornings found myself rigging my rod and making my first tentative casts in the company of four guides and two dozen other neophytes. 
The satisfaction of catching my first fish, a diminutive smallmouth bass, on the Rio Grande during my second lesson was immense.
Along with that bass, I was, all puns intended, hooked. The thrill of learning to read the water correctly, anticipating which artificial lure the fish would take, and then reeling in the splendid creature (and releasing it — I'm a "catch and release" fisherman) proved addictive.
One doesn't always catch actual fish, of course, which sometimes turns a much-anticipated outing into casting practice.
I quickly understood that fly fishing is more about learning to think like a fish – to assess the water conditions and calculate what kind of lure the fish is most likely to mistake for an edible delight – than the physical skill of casting. And then, there's the philosophical side: One doesn't always catch actual fish, of course, which sometimes turns a much-anticipated outing into casting practice. But these disappointments notwithstanding, it is always satisfying to spend time on the river.
Age Requires Accommodations 
Peaking late has taught me that while age requires accommodations, there really aren't any shortcuts. Three years ago, after completing a four-day, 80-mile guided mountain biking trip on Utah's magnificent White Rim, the sandstone plateau that lies 1,000 feet below Canyonlands National Park, two friends and I rented electric mountain bikes for an afternoon's ride. 
What a miracle: The bikes conferred the power to surmount otherwise-gnarly obstacles and the stamina to climb hills that would previously have stymied us.
But while the e-mountain bikes provided the ability to ascend previously impossible hills, they did not bestow the confidence to get down them. Nor did they confer the balance and technical ability to negotiate more-advanced trails. We three walked our bikes down a path we had joyously scaled, humbled but wiser, and unscathed.
When I regained consciousness, the Carbondale fire and rescue chief asked if I knew where I was – I did, "somewhere in Colorado" – and who was the president, which I didn't.
To be sure, peaking late is not without its pitfalls. Biking last year on a paved trail in Colorado, too much speed plus a moment's inattention took me off the path. My skinny tires slipped the asphalt surface, and I knew I was going down, hard. (I did, and don't actually know how long I was knocked out on the roadside.) When I regained consciousness, the Carbondale fire and rescue chief asked if I knew where I was – I did, "somewhere in Colorado" — and who was the president, which I didn't.
I was concussed and had punctured a lung and broken eight ribs. Six months' healing, disciplined physical therapy and considerable good luck that the damage hadn't been worse enabled me to get back on my bike, and back into the game.
All That Has Passed Me By 
There is, finally, a melancholic aspect to being a late peaker. So many things have undeniably passed me by.
For example, the air is thinner than I'd anticipated. I trained this summer to hike Mt. Elbert, at 14,400 feet the tallest mountain in Colorado and second highest in the continental U.S. Despite living at altitude and completing numerous training climbs, I couldn't make it to the top, despite having summited another 14er, Colorado's Mt. Sneffels, only two years earlier.
That melancholy is part of the devastating greater reality that our planet's best days are likely behind us. Daily, I read about America's finest fishing rivers, including Montana's Yellowstone and Big Hole, stressed from the increased heat and low river flows that characterize climate change. Only the introduction of farmed trout maintains the fishing on the rivers — the Rio Grande, Pecos and Chama — that are closest to my home.
Friends tantalize me with tales that "only" 30 and 40 years ago, Ski Santa Fe, a mere 30 minutes' drive from where I live, was blessed annually with more than 90-inch bases, deep powder guaranteed. Now, Thanksgiving opening days are iffy and snow groomers must manicure what's fallen naturally to sustain a 60-inch base.
A friend, raised on winter sports in Colorado, once said that since our perceptions are subjective, we normalize what we first experience. For that reason, I am fortunate: I moved West late in life – yet another late peaker moment. 
What I know today is all I've known. Measured against a lifetime's yearning, it's pretty darned good and I'll take it, thank you very much, better late than never — with gratitude.


Late Peaker

Jeff Zilka

Lately, my life has felt uncomfortably snug. Like the waistband of how I spend my days is squeezing each passing moment into a muffin top of unpleasantness. I feel constrained by having too many things. Things. Especially things! 
I don't know what I need to do precisely in the future. But clearing the closet has given me perspective and permission to figure it out.Things have seemingly engaged in a mutiny, threatening to overtake me, inciting an urgent need to purge my surroundings and reclaim my rightful reign. The long-tenured books huddled on the shelves flanking my television recently encroached on this undulating line in the sands of my mind, suddenly occupying far too much space. I cleared them in an afternoon with the conviction of a four-star general.
Things have seemingly engaged in a mutiny, threatening to overtake me, inciting an urgent need to purge my surroundings and reclaim my rightful reign.
The Bedroom Closet Beckoned 
Breathing relief, I still felt an internal niggling. There was no escaping that something else I had yet to name was happening. Something to do with the drumbeat of passing time echoing in my ears, deepening a need for more and less. As my internal landscape shape-shifted, I felt drawn to the bedroom closet of my 100-year-old home to see what the motherload of excess could reveal.
Surveilling the converted tiny bedroom, now a decent-sized walk-in, I eyed my scarves hanging in multitudes upon hooks protruding from an over-the-door hanger like a row of prominent noses dripping fabric and knitted yarn. 
Accumulated over the years, they've pizzazzed any lackluster ensemble with a simple draping of cloth around my neck or shoulders. Pulling them from their hooks, I held each one in my hand, feeling the weight and the texture.
A Rush of Memories 
Memories came, ushering in like a planchette on the Ouija board of my life. The long mustard-colored scarf, a gift from a former friend, the unworn accessory is enduring far beyond the length of our friendship. A flouncy black one from my cousin in Germany, a touchstone to a family I barely know, and all I have left of my mother.
The sheer rectangle, with strands of thick yarn protruding here and there, purchased on the streets of Paris tendered with francs, reminded me I had lived there once.
The sheer rectangle, with strands of thick yarn protruding here and there, purchased on the streets of Paris tendered with francs, reminded me I had lived there once. All of these I kept; the feelings and thoughts they evoked were part of the fabric of my story. Those with no memory associated with them no longer held any aesthetic or emotional appeal. They were easy to relinquish to the toss pile.
Next came the clothing. Yet again, I encountered the cranberry velvet jacket, saved by previous aspirational versions of me and never worn, still with the tags, still not buttoning. This time, it had to go. The last former me envisioned myself slimmer with a potential holiday party. I no longer want to work on getting thinner beyond what I already do. I've become more accepting of my body as it is.
And I can't remember the last holiday party I attended, my life having grown smaller yet exquisitely more dense. December used to be hobbled by weekend after weekend of obligatory cheer that exhausted me by the time January rolled around. Now, I enjoy the month with an occasional festive meal, coffee with a friend, or doing nothing and donning something comfortable and cozy.
I saved a purple sweater/cape even though it hasn't been worn in years. Its shoulders gleamed with a dandruffing of dust from lack of use. But trying it on, I liked how it fit me as I stood in front of my full-length mirror. 
The Handbag Purge 
Last, the handbag purge. Lined up on the tip-top shelf, the stretch to my toes and strain to my calves indicate they were not items I accessed regularly. 
I kept one gray canvas and another black patent, practical with pockets, zippers and adjustable shoulder straps; they could hold anything I might need for a day trip or longer. One small leather crossbody bag, sweet with a leather rosette, was too small to have a modern iPhone, rendering it useless.
I have too many memories of attempting to retrieve something only to realize I had forgotten I gave it away in a burst of minimalism. 
And then there were the relics — the summer bag from when I matched my purse to the season woven with a rope handle. I found SPF lip balm and a handful of change in the pocket. The substantial leather bags, each coated with a fine layer of dust, reminded me of the money I had spent purchasing them. I used to tell myself they were fashion statements, an investment.  
But looking back, they were in large part about status. I was proving to myself and others that I was worth something. They reflected my rudimentary attempts at self-love, gifts I gave myself purchased towards the end of my failing marriage.
I opened the black one with the big gold buttons; I'll never know how its weight did not dislocate my shoulder. Inside, there were countless used tissues. Instantly, I flashed back to my hands, adventuring into my mother's pocketbooks years ago. I could never understand all those balled-up Kleenexes.
Now, my nose drips with the regularity of a metronome. One held a slim lip liner, reminding me that I was once a woman who wore makeup daily and even cared about lip definition. The broken bits of lead from a mechanical pencil made me wonder at what juncture I had used a mechanical pencil. There was a zipped compartment stuffed with Super Plus tampons, another remnant of the past I haven't needed for over a decade.
Cough drops and throat lozenges were ubiquitous. The sum of my life peppered with sore throats, colds, runny noses and an outsized focus on my lips as I soldiered on through heavy periods. The shelf cleared, and the piles were placed into black plastic bags; I felt lighter and the air moved through my lungs more easily.
A Preference for Unfilled Space 
There was space and room. Not that I'm eager to fill it up. I much prefer unfilled space these days. Closets, drawers and corners can attract odds and ends I am not yet ready to sort, liminal spaces holding the now inching toward the past.
The undetectable growth, while happening, is now visible in the stuffed plastic bags in my closet, validating that it has occurred and that I'm better for it.
I need time to mull and consider. I have too many memories of attempting to retrieve something only to realize I had forgotten I gave it away in a burst of minimalism. I then second-guess myself, questioning my ability to anticipate my future needs from my vantage point in the present. I promised myself not to condemn this current-day me by any future me that shows up thinking she knows better.
I don't know what I need to do precisely in the future. But the clearing has given me perspective and permission to figure it out. I recognize and empathize with parts of me; others elicit pain and sadness, reminders that change is an emotional threshing. 
I hold most of the past with a soft duality of nostalgia and gratitude. The undetectable growth, while happening, is now visible in the stuffed plastic bags in my closet, validating that it has occurred and that I'm better for it.
The future me will undoubtedly know more. She will see whether I ever followed up on wearing the purple sweater/cape. She will know of any tip-toed amnesiac visits to the purse shelf and whether I chastise myself for taking the leopard print carryall to Goodwill. 
She will understand what inner workings were being recalibrated during this time. She, too, will encounter vestiges of her previous self as she rummages through her closet, making her way to whatever comes next. 


Closet Therapy: When It's Time to Throw a Few Things Out

Laura Petiford

Maybe you're getting a tax refund this spring. If you can spare the cash, how about investing at least some of it in an underserved population where your dollars could do a lot of good? Girls' and women's nonprofits receive only 1.8% of overall charitable giving. How much more could they do with real funding?
"Giving women the resources and tools to succeed makes a huge difference in their families and their communities.""Investing in girls and women is a lever for economic progress here and around the world," says Una Osili, associate dean for research at the Indiana University Lilly Family School of Philanthropy. "By improving women's economic security, we invest in stability for the entire community."
"Investing in girls and women is a lever for economic progress here and around the world."
A small endowment this tax season is an investment in the next generation of creators, scientists, nurturers and community builders.
A Little Charity Goes a Long Way
As a few examples, these nonprofits focus on girls and women and have earned top-tier scores from the donor watchdog group Charity Navigator:
• Pink Ribbon Good gives practical support to women battling breast or gynecological cancer. A $50 contribution provides transportation to and from one cancer treatment session.
• Girlstart empowers girls in grades 4 through 8 through fun, informal STEM (science, technology, engineering and mathematics) education programs. A $100 donation supplies materials for a week's after-school program.
• Women, Food and Agriculture Network trains leaders, builds networks and offers education to women in sustainable food-systems development. A $150 gift supports a soil health and water quality workshop at a Women Caring for the Land event.
• The National Domestic Violence Hotline is the only 24/7 national, anonymous and confidential hotline for people affected by relationship abuse. Every $200 that is raised is enough to connect, on average, four survivors with a live advocate via phone, chat or text.
• Girls Who Invest diversifies an industry by offering Gen-Zers education, mentoring and internships in investment management; 69% are women of color. A contribution of $250 provides a week's meals during the Summer Intensive Program.
'A Gender Lens'
Giving USA, the publisher of an authoritative annual report on philanthropic fundraising and spending, doesn't break out donations to charities specifically for women and girls. But most nonprofits in the categories it does have, such as "religion," "human services," "education" and "health," serve girls and women generally already. You may ask why we need charities specifically for women and girls.
Osili, a Harvard graduate who earned a Ph.D. from Northwestern, says that "bringing a gender lens helps show disparities and specific barriers more clearly.
"Take education: Around the world, girls and young women often have no access to schools; opening classrooms to girls enables them to contribute more to society, so opportunity accelerates progress," Osili says.
"Opportunity accelerates progress."
In the United States, the lens might focus more on childcare. What most helps a low-income mother achieve a higher-paying job? Affordable, quality childcare so she can go back to school, Osili says. "But without a gender lens on the subject, we may be missing out on ways to accelerate solutions to the problems for which donors are giving."
Top philanthropists are thinking this way already. In 2007, through her charitable foundation, Oprah Winfrey made a point of creating the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls in South Africa, which continues to serve girls of poverty and promise. She calls it "my greatest legacy."
In 2015, Melinda Gates committed $1 billion to expanding women's power and influence in the U.S. and wrote a book, "The Moment of Lift," about "how empowering women changes the world."
Growing Funding Grows Girls
Take a look at just one part of the world: Los Angeles, where a group called the Los Angeles Women's Giving Circle has worked for years to research nonprofits and decide where to donate its members' pool of funds. An early choice was Motivating Our Students Through Experience, (MOSTe) which mentors girls from underserved neighborhoods to and through college.
Since 2007, the giving circle has donated tens of thousands of dollars to MOSTe, says Bonnie Davidoff, one of the group's founders. "Why? Because with double even a small income, a worthy nonprofit can pay staff better, so the staff stay on longer and hire a grant writer to bring in longer-term support for their work," she explains. Before such early infusions, MOSTe was all volunteer; now it has an executive director and three other paid staff.
With a growing number of donations of $100 to $150, says Amy Ludwig, who was MOSTe's executive director until February, MOSTe has been able to offer college visits, communication workshops (complete with instruction on how to give effective "elevator speeches") and career fairs to a growing number of recipients in 6th through 12th grade. There are 110 at present.
Altogether, the nonprofit has helped more than 2,000 girls and young women; 60 are currently in college. "Compared with peers of similar demographics — first-generation students of color from low-income backgrounds — our students graduate college at vastly higher rates," Ludwig says proudly.
"Once I've settled into my career, I hope to be a mentor for MOSTe," a young woman who signed on with the nonprofit as a seventh grader wrote late last year. Having made it successfully through high school and college, she is now teaching fifth grade at a Title I school in Los Angeles.
"Empowering women changes the world."
'Donors Can Make a Big Difference'
There is little research on "women's causes" and their big donors. The Lilly Family School Women's Philanthropy Institute (WPI) is one entity studying how gender shapes donor behavior. It has learned from fundraisers, donors and advisers as well as nonprofits' mission statements and programs about what they do and whom they serve.
Last October, WPI produced "The Women & Girls Index 2023: Measuring Giving to Women's and Girls' Organizations," the latest edition of data on charitable organizations dedicated to women and girls. It found that as of 2020, these nonprofits received only 1.8% of overall charitable giving, a figure that has barely budged. The good news? That total in dollars was up just over 9% from the year before.
"Issues affecting women and girls (for example, the gender pay gap, sexual harassment and assault) have received increased attention in recent years, but charitable giving to organizations addressing these issues lags behind," the report says.
'Individuals Can Make a Big Difference'
"While the state of funding for women and girls is dismal," it adds, "this also means that individual donors can make a big difference" for members of the Women and Girls Index (WGI), the only comprehensive analysis of charitable giving to organizations dedicated to women and girls in the United States.
WGI nonprofits tend to be smaller than average, both in funding and in staff, the report notes — and this offers an opportunity for small donors. "A lot of small organizations are trying to make a difference, and we can help them become more sustainable and increase their capacity," explains Dawna Cobb, a longtime Baltimore backer of nonprofits that support women and families. "Giving women the resources and tools to succeed makes a huge difference in their families and their communities."
"When I think of how I want to leave the world better for my daughter and grandchildren to come, it means — from a financial perspective — I'm helping countless people I do not know," says Texas-based philanthropy consultant Fayruz Benyousef, a longtime donor to and board member of the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
"When you think about your purpose, when you think of someone who helped you in a time of great need, you know that a gift to any organization that's helping women is a seed planted to improve lives forever."


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